HOME › Hot Topics › Girl Zone › Need Advice › boy wants abortion… i don’t know
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April 19, 2007 at 10:45 am #16988specialK
Hey everyone,
I am 19 sophmore in college, i am five weeks and three days pregnant, and i have no ONE to ask for help….
soo i am asking you all what you think…my boyfriend is older and is in process of purchasing a house for me, that was before i found out i was pregnant… i told him and instead of being happy… he was irate… he insists i have a abortion, and i am not sure i want one, he says if i dont’ he wont’ give me the house, (and i can’t afford rent, i have no family) he won’t have anything to do with the child.. i don’t know what to do…
should i have the abortion or not…April 20, 2007 at 5:31 am #17006lisaHiiiii! I’m Lisa and I am from the Stand Up Girl website.
When I read your e-mail, my heart lept for fear for you. Please understand, when you read my e-mail response to you, it is from a heart of caring and a girl that has experienced what you are considering doing. Abortion.
Please please know that NO MAN IS WORTH THE LIFE OF YOUR CHILD. I can tell you already have the heart of a mommy! You don’t want the abortion, and just by being at this website is a sort of wonderful way of reaching out.
Well I reach back to you and ask you to please take my hand … I will walk this walk through the pregnancy with you and I will encourage you as I know that countless other girls on this site will do for you too.
When we choose abortion, we choose, also a lifetime of regret and pain. Then the man that MADE you get the abortion will be attached to that memory forever. Bitterness often times follows and he is the one that is making you choose. Him and a house or the life of your baby.
Please please – life is so much better than the material gain of a home. And you will also be able to find, one day, a man that will absolutely and totally fall head over heels in love with you and your beautiful baby and want to make a protective covering and a home over you. Not threatent you with "If you don’t kill your baby – I won’t give you a home."
Please forgive me … I’m not upset with you … I’m angry that this guy puts the responsibility of this horrible decision over you and dangles a house in front of you like a carrot in front of a horse.
You are far better than that. You can be a Stand Up Girl and I will also give you a website to help you locate nearby free help. THey can help you locate financial assistance and more. I bet you … that your boyfriends tune would change IMMEDIATELY after he laid eyes on that beautiful bundle of joy.
Please – choose life for you and your baby. Don’t listen to him. THere is far better out there for you. OK?
Here is the website and even a toll free 800#
800-395- HELP (4357)
You can also e-mail me at the Stand Up Girl website or just reply here on your posting. OK?
Please let me know how you are.
Luv Lisa
April 20, 2007 at 8:11 am #17010mummy2addysonaw girl im going through the same thing. im preggo with my 2nd child and the father doesnt want it (he was cheating on his gf with me) but i dont think i could handle it either so im practically forced to go through it. you on the other hand dont have to! if that man is trying to force you to have an abortion when you dont want to… he isnt worth keeping around. have you looked into getting some financial help from a government agency over there? seriously… there are ways to deal with having a baby on your own. im a solo mum now too and i manage to get by… like lisa said… when you go through something like that you will always wonder "what if"… having a baby is the most amazing thing you will ever do in your life and if you think you are emotionally ready to do it… then i say do it! i hope i have helped a little.. *hugs*
April 20, 2007 at 11:13 pm #17017momma_of_isaAww, well I agree completely with Lisa… she said most of the things that I have in mind. I never went through an abortion, but i can only imagine how hard it would be on you! Your life would never be the same if you kill your own baby! I am so sorry that you have to have a man like that in your life and no family by your side… but hold your head up high girl! YOu can make it on your own and you dont need no man to survive!! I wish you the best of luck and you will be in my prayers!!
April 25, 2007 at 3:42 pm #17077angel_gal84im 23 and i had an abortion last year in oct, it was and still is the most hardest thing to get over, i had the abortion just to keep my man. The early this month (april) i was 10 weeks pregnant and i lost it.
Please keep your child, i wish i stood up to my man he first time around and kept it, would be due in 2 weeks with my first one.
PLEASE CONSIDER WHAT YOU WANT AND NOT WHAT YOUR MAN WANTS ITS YOUR BODY AFTER ALL.
April 27, 2007 at 7:32 am #17104bweberdon’t take the life of ur baby just because of some lousy man…if he doesn’t want to be a daddy he can at least pay for child support and then u would be albe to afford to take care of ur baby and ur self…
April 27, 2007 at 5:46 pm #17109CaigedI’m sorry you’re in this situation. I am in a similar situation as well, minus the house. The thing is, even when you feel alone, you have to look within yourself to see what you think is right. Take away the house, the man…. do you want to have the baby?
There are also other options. Adoption is one that would allow you to give birth to the child without having the expenses of raising it. This may be something he will accept too.
Do what is right for you. I’ve learned the hard way that giving in to a man’s wishes does not work out so well in the end.
My thoughts are with you.
April 28, 2007 at 6:23 am #17118ZitahnaI can only imagine what you are feeling right now. When I was 18 I got pregnant with my first baby and my boyfriend flipped out… demanded that I have an abortion. Know what I did? I laughed at him — reminded him that abortion has NEVER been and NEVER will be an option for me. Needless to say, we split up and I ended up raising that baby on my own. While I did have a very supportive family that helped me till I was back on my feet, I do know that there are government programs out there that will help you out if you cannot do it alone. My daughter is now 5, and I have a 12 week old, but we still don’t have a house. Even if one had been dangled in front of me like some huge prize (gifts don’t have stipulations) I have to say that it still would have been no question for me. After doing a presentation on abortion in high school and learning about all of the abortion procedures in detail, I will NEVER believe that there is even one moment after conception that abortion is acceptable. If you are still on the fence I urge you to please research the subject thoroughly before you make your decision. And please, please, please consider adoption, as many want babies and are unable to do so. Please email me if you ever want to talk. I will be praying for you, Emily
May 4, 2007 at 3:52 am #17178swicky102706I had an abortion because the father suggested it and so we wouldnt have to tell my family. It wasnt what i wanted and now i liveeveryday wondering "What If". There are prgrams out there to help your money and living situation. And support groups to help you, you’re not alone. If you want this baby then dont listen to the father. I wish I could go back and make the right decision, but I cant and now i have to live with it. Follow your heart.
May 4, 2007 at 8:49 pm #17188roddiHello my name is Roddi & I am a Stand Up Guy. I believe children are a gift from God. Please choose life for your gift. No guy is worth all the pain & regret that an abortion will bring. I am a voice for the unborn to say CHOOSE LIFE.
August 13, 2007 at 6:22 am #18637roddiDoes anyone know what this girls decision was? Did she have the abortion or did she choose life for her baby? Thank You A friend to the unborn Roddi:
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