A regretted Choice

My boyfriend enlisted around july or august. Beforei wasnt worried about him flipping out if i ever got prego. September a condom broke and i got the conseqeunces of a bad rubber. We figured out 2 months later, he opted for abortion because his career didnt need any money taken out of it. I wanted it but knew he wouldnt be around and would just get child support. That was fine with me. My parents figured it out in early january. They opted for a abortion too even telling me personal stories about some theyve had or heard about. 3 vs 1. I kicked and screamed but i was eventually persuaded so to say in their minds, more like forced. Surprisly the boyfriend stuck around and decided to help out no matter what happened. My parents set up a appointment at the clinic for a 3 day procedure without my permission. Had to stay in town in case something bad happened. I finished the first 2 days fine but the last day i dreaded it by then it was already to late to back out. Before we left i got sick and dizzy. even throwing up the chinese my partner thought would help me relax. My partner thought it was my decison when it was my parents. I got back home after than and for the next 2 weeks i was excused from gym to heal. Within that amount of time i start thinking and emotions kicked in. I started hating all 3 because they were involved for not only my pain but also my babys. He eventually figured out what my true feelings were and we got talking about what my baby girl would miss out on, how she would look and act. I still resent my parents for doing that to me. I still remain on good terms in their mind. If they knew everything i have playing in my head its a different story. Nightmares plague me every night to the point of sleep deprivation. Im to the point i dont want a kid because of januarys procedure. I cant even stand to look at my youngest cousin. Its been a year and 2 months and me and my partner are still going strong getting through this problem ourselves. It will be on his mind when hes at basic while ill be worrying about him in georgia and therapy to help get over my resentment.