A little depressed

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      i feel kinda bad because im looking at the other posts in this section and some of you girls are going thru worst things than i can imagine. I thinking im just feeling a little depressed and needing to talk to someone… Today was sucha bad day for me…

      Ive been working with this attorney who has become more of a friend and mentor and even tho she doesnt know im pregnant she knows that my parents are extremly upset with me because i spent the night at my boyfriends house. (which i still think is no big deal). Anyways my parents got so mad they took everything away from me and im like living in prison(keep in mind, no one except you guys no im pregnant). My mom decided that she doesnt want me anymore and my dad cant wait to beat the crap out of me.

      And so i come here to work, and all i get is more lectures, she called me stupid and told me that im just going to end up a pregnant teen pumping gas at a station.. That I’ll never go to college, and how could i do that to my mom- that im stupidest most inconsiderate person with no common sence for causing my mother sooo much stress and making my dad (that wants to hurt me) cry. All she did was basically talk crap about how im soo much better, and she thought i was so much smarter (this is alll over me spending the night at my boyfriends), and that my boyfriend is not even going to stick around if i do get pregnant… needles to say every adult i know has just told me about how bad my life is going to be.. and i dont wanna believe it.. i know that even if i do live with him, im going to go to college (duh, why would i) nothing can get in my way.. and with a baby, a blessing, it will just be better, maybe harder but then it makes the success 10 times better… I have just become so depressed in the past week.. you know i had a dream it was perfect.. i told my parents and i didnt even need a police officer for protection and they were upset but even tho they cried they were just like
      "ok" live with him (my boyfriend) and they were somewhat supportive..

      I kno sooo many teens, half of them friends of mine, that get pregnant and they’re parents support them (mentally, not always financially) and they go on to do great things because instead of their parents turning them away.. they stick around like they should as parents. my back up plan incase everything blows up is a pregnancy crises shelter 40 mins from where i live… id need my moms permission.. but i dont know what else to do… if im not allowed to stay with my boyfriend family who does care about me… living with my parents.. i cant imagine it being good for me the baby…

      if you read this whole depressed story.. thanks.. it just sucks feeling this alone in such a hard world. i have such big dreams i know exactly where i wanna go to college and what i wanna be.. and i know how im going to get there.. i just need some approval.. i can do this with this baby I KNO i can… n im just trying not to let all those people who are against me, bring me down… thanks for reading. Elena- 17 y/o


        Omigosh I’m so excited, my name’s Alayna too and I’m 17 and pregnant. Buuuuut thats about where the similarities end. I know how you feel, about being alone and depressed. When I first found this website I was like "omygosh all these poor girls that get beat and got raped and got kicked out of their houses and omygosh i dont have it as bad as I thot I did" I found out I was pregnant when I went into the hospital for a kidney infection. I found out I was already 5 months along! Of course I had suspected but tried to hide it as long as possible to avoid my parents reactions. My parents were super beyond dissapointed and my dad was rly mad and my brothers and my dad all wanna go kill my boyfriend but I dont see why b/c it takes two ya kno? My family supports me financially and kinda-sorta supports me emotionally tho they’re all still mad at me. My boyfriend’s family on the other hand is extreamly supportive and has opened their homes to me should I need it. But the other night I was just sitting on the computer rly depressed. I was trying to figure out if I wanted to give the baby up for adoption or if I wanted to try and keep it and I was getting absolutely nowhere. I was feeling so bad that I was seriously considering suicide for awhile. I’m grounded from my bf and I cant talk to him at all (except I see him at school) so I rly didnt have anyone to share how I felt with and I was just feeling rly down. So I went on google and typed in ‘online teenage mother support groups’ and found this website. It made me feel sooooooo much better to know that I wasnt alone. And it helped me make my decision, I decided after reading about all the girls that were in such worse situatons than me that mine wasnt so bad and that I wanted to keep the baby. I’m rly glad that you at least know where you want to go in life and know how to get there. I have no idea where I want to go or wat I want to be…I’m good at englsih and art. Thats it. Well, I just spilled my whole story to you I guess whether u wanted to hear it or not. I just got rly excited b/c we have the same name tho spelt differently and we’re both 17….*laughs* oh well. I’m crazy. Hope everything works out for the best for you and ur bf and the baby!! Keep hold of your dreams no matter what! ~Alayna


          i hope everything works out for you.. good luck… if you need someone to talk to im justa message away.


            Well Elena, I agree with the attorney but I strongly dissagree with the way she said things. I dont think you are stupid but I do think that you are missled. Sometimes it is hard to look at the decisions we make as "bad" and when your family is rejecting you in so many different ways we feel like the only way out is to run to the thing that they are against. I did the same thing for years. I think what the attorney was telling you is that your mom loves you (even if she is not showing it) and it had to have hurt your parents that you made the choice to sleep with your boyfriend. It seems like your parents havent set a healthy example in front of you. I only found out a few months ago that my dad and stepmom were sleeping together before marriage (12 yrs married now) and my dad was so angry when I got preg with my daughter but then when I got preg with my son he refused to talk to me for a really long time. Right before I got married my brother lied to my dad and told him that I confided in him and admitted to sleeping with my now husband before we were married. Not only do I not talk to my brother but he lives to cause problems. My dad believed him because of my past and didnt come to my wedding!!! Our first time was on our wedding night and it was amazing to know that we had not crossed that line. For my dad to judge me on a lie even though he had moved my stepmom in before marriage hurt me so badly. Sometimes the people who love us most are very hipocritical when it comes to practicing what they preach. I guess this is all to say that it is wrong to have sex outside of marriage. It causes destruction in our lives, it lowers our self worth, it takes away from Gods best for us, and it leaves you in tough situations. Just because you are preg and your not a virgin anymore doesnt mean that you have to continue to have sex with your boyfriend. You can start over today living a life of purity and I believe that you will go on to college and that you will have great success in life. If you want to prove your parents and the other negative people in your life wrong then I would encourage you to take a stand and prove them wrong with your actions. Wait untill marriage to have sex again, go to college, mother your child with love and acceptance (of what is right) respect your parents authority while you are with them, start making new choices and you will blow their minds. If your boyfriend loves you he will committ to you. Dont sleep with him untill he marries you. You can make it through this tough time but you cant do it on your own!!! There is Someone who came into my life and helped me to start over…I was in a huge mess and there was no way that I could have fixed it…it took alot of tears, changes, self-control,and humility….I asked Jesus to come into my heart and I admitted to Him that I had done things my way too long and that I needed His help to get my life together…..if you make the same choice He will help you but hold on cause your life will dramatically change…..it isnt always easy doing it Gods way but it is so worth it because He is by your side giving you strngth for each day. I hope this helps you and I am praying that the Lord will bring you encouragers to love on you and guide you into truth and that you will have the strength to make the right choices….Love and Prayers….Meagan

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