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Anonymous
okay so here it is i’m 17 and i may be pregnant the problem is i have only been with my boyfriend a month so its like really soon and all on the pregnancy and the relationship but i don’t know how i can support the baby if i have no job and my parents will just react totally way bad to it they have already said if i ever get pregnant its my responsibility and i know that they just wont help look after it.
My bf has already said that i should have an abortion because he doesn’t want kids at this age and no to adoption because he feels when he is 35/36 he doesn’t want an 18 year old kid coming up to him saying that he is their farther so basically hes saying the only thing i can do is have an abortion :dry: and there is me i’m completely confused on what i should do if i am pregnant and it’s positive. :dry:
Hey there,
first of all, do not let anyone – friends, parents, your boyfriend – presuure you into making a certain decision. This is something you have to put a lot of thought into. I would advise against abortion, only because it is very emotionally damaging to lose a child, especially if you choose to do so intentionally. Your parents are right to tell you it is your responsibility, because that is what it is. Your baby, your child, your job to look after it. If you feel that your boyriend will not be there for you if you decide to keep the baby, don’t let that decide your baby’s fate. If he’s not man enough to support a decision you’re making about YOUR body, than he’s not worth losing your baby over. If you honestly feel that you can’t look after a baby, then give adoption some serious thought. There are lots of options with that aswell. If you can’t stand the thought of giving up your baby entirely, look at couples willing to negotiate an open adoption. That allows you to be in your child’s life, but still lets your child be in a financially stable home. Abortion is not the only option, and many people have found ways to be a single teen parent and give thier children the best life. There are lots of support groupd out there, and people willing and ready to help you through your pregnancy and looking after your baby while trying to get school, work etc. done. This is something you really need to think long and hard about. To be brutally honest, your boyfriend is being selfish by pressuring you the way he is. Having an abortion will haunt you mentally and emotionally for a long time, and it can cause a lot of psychological issues if you’re pressured into it, or are not fully commited to it. It is also can be physically taxing. I wish you all the luck in the world, but I ask you to please consider all the options and think it through on your own. Don’t let someone else bully you into something you don’t want.
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