HOME › Hot Topics › Girl Zone › Need Advice › 15 , in a committed relationship ; want baby
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September 1, 2010 at 4:24 am #27492staceeypower
Hey there ,
so i could really use some advice.
I am fifteen years old , going into grade ten next week . I have a boyfriend of 17 months , and a very close family.Lately , the both of us had thoughts. I wanted a baby for 4 months now but lately its hitting me hard. We both have dreams of having a child and it makes us sad to realize ; its not real. I dont know what to do , or how to tell my mom. I have told a few close people (including a girl my exact age whose pregnant) who have gave great advice and been here for me so much. I have a two year old brother who is my world , he sleeps with my almost nightly and it makes me want one even more.
If someone could please help me on what to do , I’d appreciate it greatly !
Thanks a lot , Staceey.
September 1, 2010 at 6:39 am #27493ShinEEstarI don’t know your situation so i can’t be of much help but i know that being and tenth grade and having a baby is not easy. It’s a struggle. I’m a senior is highschool and i’m terrified of the changes soon to come. Babies are wonderful but they don’t stay babies forever. It’s a lifetime commitment and my opinon is to wait girl. Society is not really kind to teen moms and someone will always be saying bad things about you, even if they dont know you. Finish school. Have a stable home and income, it’s easier that way. Instead of dealing with the goverment for support, it gives me headaches! Please, please think about it. QW~
September 1, 2010 at 8:39 pm #27494Stockton09Hun, I know what it is like to want a baby so bad it hurts. I’ve been there. First child I got pregnant with I lost when I was a little over two months pregnant. I was fifteen at the time, wasn’t planned or anything. It’s horrible. Then I got pregnant at the end of my tenth grade year and found out that summer. I made the choice to keep my baby and later decided that if I was going to be a mother, I needed to marry the love of my life. I started eleventh grade, and soon realized that pregnancy was harder then I ever thought. I was sick all the time, my teachers, and classmates was so mean to me. I was called all kinds of names and even threatened. At one point someone elbowed me in the stomach, when I said something to the teachers they told me it was my fault. I quit school after that. I use to get emails and comments telling me they was going to push me down the stairs and save my child’s life. I was even told to abort my child when I was six months pregnant because if I didn’t my child would just kill itself because of ho horrible of a mother I will be. Today my son is six months old, and he is the love of my life. I would go through everything all over again for him. But it is one of the hardest things you have to do in life. Being a mother at seventeen is very rough. I don’t get to just go hang out with a friend if I want to, I don’t get to go to the movies whenever I please. I’ve yet to finish school because I feel if I do I will be a bad mother. I breastfeed my son so I can’t work. My husband supports us on a part time job. Sometimes we even struggle for money. It breaks my heart to know that Braxton can’t have everything he wants whenever he wants it. My advice to you is to wait, your only fifteen. You have your entire life to have as many kids as you want. Right now you probably don’t work, you still need to graduate, and move out on your own. No one can really tell you what to do, but I promise you if you wait it will be much better on your child, you, and your boyfriend. You may not think this but, what if one day your boyfriend say’s “I can’t do this anymore, it’s too much” then your left on your own to raise your child without his help. I’m not trying to scare you, but having a child isn’t just smiles and look at me I’m a mommy. It’s so much more then that.September 6, 2010 at 1:02 am #27499teenmummy2008I was in a committed relationship at 15 (he’s the same age) and had only been with my bf for 5 months when he proposed and i said yes. When we had been together for 11 months i found out i was pregnant (i was in my final year of school). Going through my exams was so hard it took me longer as my morning sickness was severe i was going to the toilet all the time, i had it all day and night so it just wasn’t mornings. My baby was due in December that year so my college told me there wasn’t any point in me going as i would miss most of the year, so i took 2 years out to raise our son. It was hard i moved out of my parents house at 16, moved into a hostel when my son was a month old and got our own flat when he was 6 months old. During those 6 months i got post natal depression and had to have tablets to help. I used to go out with friends all the time and since i’ve gotten pregnant i haven’t seen my friends and haven’t gone out, i stay in on the weekends and just relax when my baby is in bed. He is 21 months old now and i’ve been with his dad for 3 1/2 years.
You should think about the financial side of having a baby it’s not cheap i can’t afford much for myself after buying nappies, food and things my son really needs. Most teenagers see babies as an accessories but they don’t realise how hard it is and don’t look from every aspect. Think about it will your bf stick around when you fall pregnant? Will your mom be supportive? I had the support of my parents but not many people are lucky. Will you be able to afford a baby? I was lucky enough to have my parents help out with some things even though they couldn’t afford it. Will you still want to change nappies and do night feeds instead of being out with your friends? Think about things proper before you decide you want a baby. -
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