Hey there….I am so sorry for your loss and regret! I am not sure quite what to say as I don’t know you personally but I DO know that there is a lot of FREE and CONFIDENTIAL help out there for you! I have known many women who have aborted and it is very common to feel depressed and have nightmares….A good resource for some counseling would be to contact Optionline.org, Enter your postal code into their website and it will give you the contact info for the closest Pregnancy Help Center near you where you can get some post abortive help and counseling….They have many options such as one on one help and also group sessions with other women, that way you will not feel so alone in your struggle for healing….I hope you can get connected with your local center and find some help with your nightmares and depression….A loss is a loss and even though you made the choice to abort, you ARE allowed to grieve the loss of your child…There is healing in that alone and in giving place to that pain….Much love to you and I hope you will come back and let us all know of any progress you make and if you were able to get help from your local center! Meg <3