Lets see how do I explain myself, My name Is Jacque, I was brought into the world March 15,1989 I guess that would make me 19 in a few days. Ive always had great birthday presents, i suppose this years is going to be the most life changing. I just found out that I am pregnant about 3 days ago. At first ii found my self upset and alone, knowing that my boyfriend of 3 years wouldnt be happy. These first 3 days have been trying, the options of abortion and keeping the baby constantly flipping through my mind like a drunkn daze. The first morning i actually ended up pinching my self and asking my boyfriend if last night was real or a dream, I guess i always belived this would never happen to me. Being a christian, i was raised not to belive in abortion, although i will not say it hasnt crossed my mind. To my fathers family pregnancy out of wedlock is a sin, that even my unwed cousins who have children from my mothers side are talked about with a personification of disqust.
I lost my mother who was 7 months pregnant when i was 15, and for the first time since her death ive been dreaming about her and my unborn sister jocelynn. I believe that God is telling me something, that its time to change my life and start new, that maybe this will end as my blessing.
I just found last night, after speaking with my pastor, that i will be keeping the baby,that despite what others may say and the wrath that i will receive from my fathers family will all be worth it in the end. I am scared, but excited, I am alone but strong. I know that i can make it, and maybe one day i can go back to school to start my nursing program.
