Hi. my name is Sara and i am 16 and a junior in high school. I found out i was pregnant on July 24, 2001. I was 15 years old. I had taken a test 4 days prior to that, and it was negative. My mother found out about it and bought another test. i will never forget those agonizing 4 mintutes as me and my mom stared at the test. a faint line showed up and i started crying and saying “its not a line, it cant be a line”. Sure enough it was a line. a line is a line is a line. whether its faint or not. I had already decided that i was going to have this child, there is no way that i could have done anything differently.
Things were very rough the first few weeks. my boyfriend had left for a week for band camp, and i was camping. My dad didnt really talk to me much, i guess the shock was overwhelming. In the beginning of august i started writing letters to my unborn child. At the end of my camping week was when i started to get morning sickness. it was awful. every single morning i would throw up. Then when school started, it was the same routine every day. get up, throw up, take a shower, go to school. School was very difficult. I got alot of looks from people. Many thinking i was lying about being pregnant, and others just staring at me because they felt like it. I only told 2 people, and before i knew it, the entire population knew. (ok, well not the whole population knew, but you get the point). That is why i love the phrase “You cant keep a secret between 3 people unless 2 are dead”. There is so much truth to that. Days went by, and my morning sickness grew very old and felt never ending. Then my clothes began to not fit, and i began to show. First i was pretty small, then out of no where i popped.
There is no way i could have hid my pregnancy if i had wanted to. As i got farther along, the more looks i would get. Then came the heartburn. i went through bottles and bottles of tums. Then in the beginning of November, the 6th to be exact, i had my first ultrasound. I found out that she was healthy, had 10 fingers and 10 toes, and that i was having a girl. i could not have been happier. We had already picked out names, we had them picked out in the very beginning of my pregnancy. I remember feeling her kicks and somersaults. And how amazing it was to know i had this life inside of me. My due date drew closer and i got bigger and bigger.
On April 1st, me and my boyfriends one year anniversary, he proposed to me. I was a blimp so i was sitting on the floor, but it was so sweet. of course i said yes. I got really sick a week before my due date. and about a couple days before i was due i went to the doctor. he gave me cough syrup witn codeine. I had an allergic reaction to it. I itched everywhere. it was awful. This went on for a few days before i went to the hospital. On the 5th of April we went to the hospital at midnight. They did an ultrasound and it showed i had little fluid around the baby. Then the doctor told me they were going to induce me. I wasnt supposed to be in labor until the 7th. but i went into labor on my own after they did these inserts into my cervix to soften it. My contractions never stopped and were so painful. I kept throwing up because i hadnt eaten anything. the nurses all said i was handling the pain very well and i knew how to breathe. i got an epidural when i was 5 centimeters dialated. let me tell you, that man is my BEST FRIEND! I could not feel a thing, and that was great. I feel asleep for about 3 hours and when i woke up i was 8 cm dialated.
WHen i was 10 cm i started pushing. My doc told me it would be 2-3 hours before she would be born. i was like “uh uh”. I had her out in 45 minutes. I tore and i had an Epsiotomy (spelled that wrong). Emily Makayla was born on APril 6th, 2002 at 10:16 pm. The most beautiful child i have ever seen. I could not believe that she is a part of me. Here i am a year later. Emily will be turning a year old a week from sunday. This year has gone by so fast. i do not regret having a child. She has given me a reason to wake up each morning and enjoy life to the fullest. Sure i am young, but that doesnt mean i cant give my daughter the life she deserves. she is amazing. She has such an amazing personality. I love being a mother and i would not trade it for anything in this world. Its hard to believe that i went from being pregnant to being a mother in 11 hours. We are a happy family, and we have lots of support. Its hard, but i love it. I love my family. It was all worth it.
I just really want to encourage you in what you are doing. You are a mother; what nobler profession is there than that? You have given life to a new human being; a new soul exists in this world because of you and your willingness to say “yes”. What a beautiful example you will be to many.
It isn’t always easy, I know, but at least you know that you are doing the right thing. You don’t have to live with huge regrets. You don’t have to deal with the long-term side effects that girls experience after an abortion. You never have to wonder what your baby would have looked like, been like. Instead you get to look into the eyes of your daughter and laugh with her, cry with her, experience life with her. Isn’t that awesome?! I am so thankful that I am allowed to be part of this miracle…this miracle of life.
God bless you and little Emily.