I’m feeling so isolated and lonely… My friends no longer have time for me and I feel like I have no one to turn to. My boyfriend is always there for me, but he doesn’t really understand what is going on inside this head of mine… and to be honest, neither do I.

I thought that I wanted to keep the baby but no, my head is all over the place. I feel like a complete failure and disappointment to my family, so I still haven’t plucked up the courage to tell my mum. I’m really not ready to be a mum… I’m putting so much weight on and I hate it. I cry over the smallest matters; everything is just so unbearable.

What if i mess up?… I’m gonna be in charge of a life and I can’t even handle my own. This baby deserves the best, and it won’t get that… If I keep it, my boyfriend won’t tell his family because they’re Muslims and they wouldn’t accept it. That means my baby’s dad would be a part-time father and wouldn’t be there for me 100% like i would want him to be. He’s not ready to be a dad either and I don’t think he wants to lose his family. My mum lives in another city so it would be hard for me to get some help from her.

I wish i could turn back time but I know it’s too late… I’m just so lost… I’m not ready to have a child but then again, I’m not ready to kill my baby either. I really don’t know what to do… PLEASE SOMEONE HELP ME…