When I was 16 years old, I had my beautiful little boy, with a guy I loved with all my heart. About 2 months after our son was born, he took off, he wasn’t ready to “grow up”. My son will be 2 in February, and his dad started coming back around again in September. We reunited, and tried to work out our relationship again. Needless to say, I couldn’t let go of our past, and I couldn’t allow myself to accept the way he treats me so horribly. I left, only to find out I’m pregnant with his child, again. I’m now 18. He nearly caused me my job, so I’m on a probation period of no more than 15 hours a week, and only getting minimum wage. My son’s father came to me today, told me he lost his job. That also means no child support. I was receiving about 400$ a month in child support. I have no where near enough money to support myself, plus two children. I forgot to mention, I live with my parents. My mother told me I have to be out on my own before the second baby is born. I cannot afford that either. I’m not sure what to do. I don’t think that I could ever really consider abortion, but I do think that maybe adoption is the right choice in this situation, although, I am not sure I could bare the pain of giving a child away to perfect strangers. I am not sure what to do. I have absolutely no support at all. I have no friends. I have very little family. I have no one. My ex was so controlling that he was all I had, and now that I left him I am left with nothing and no one. I don’t know what to do. Someone please help with some advice?
No idea what to do..
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That sounds so much like my story. I to had my son at 16 with continous break up and make up with his father, looking back at it now I can kick myself for allowing my sons father to mess me around like he did. Onething I can tell you not to do is an abortion. I was at the exact age as you when I feel pregnant with my second child, and out of fear for my parents and fear for raising another child of a man that beat me up so badly, I was hospitilized. I convinced myself I had no other option I just couldnt put another child through what my current child was already suffering from, instability, insecurity, fighting, etc. I went through with the abortion but before I invited Christ into my life, the abortion tore me apart daily. Everyday I would imagine how the baby would look, how old she/he would be, it didnt stop until God I forgave myself and allowed God to make me whole again. Allow God to do the same for you and He will tell you what to do.
Oh wow LMboots, I'm sure you are so torn! First off, you are definitely in a major hard spot. I am proud you have been working and caring for your son and I am proud that you are seeking out advice. You are a mother, and I can tell you want the best for your children. I am glad you say abortion is not really a consideration…it is definitely not best for baby or your health. So I don't know in what ways I can help, but there are some good websites and groups who can give you more information and help concerning adoption or the choices you are now making. They would have resources and more expertise. Optionline.org, SaintChild.org, HandsofGraceministies.org, LovesChoice.com, bethany.org. I hope you can find resources, someone to talk with, and advice on keeping or placing your child in a loving family. My prayers and best of wishes! P.s. 3 of my siblings are adopted and my life would so be lacking without them. I am forever grateful for the mothers who made such an incredibly hard choice. <3