Dear Becky,

How are you doing? I hope you’re good. I thought I’d e-mail you and thank you for making StandUpGirl.com. It helped me thru a tough time.

I never even thought about aborting my first child, Baylee. I got pregnant when I was 14 and had her when I was 15. After I got over my depression and fears from my first pregnancy I felt like I was on top of the world. I had a great boy friend, and supportive friends and family (and of course, God.) I had a beautiful baby girl on January 23rd, 2000. She is a big part of me. We were doing fine. But that all changed when I moved to California away from my boy friend and friends. It shattered my heart into a million pieces. And it was so hard to break up with my boy friend.

Even though I was still in love with my boyfriend I started dating again. I was on depo provera birth control shots but I ended up pregnant again (birth control failed me 2 times.) I was so freaked out and shocked. And when I told my boy friend he broke up with me. I was so scared and depressed. I thought about keeping the baby but I thought, “Shit… Another kid? I can’t have another baby right now.” And besides my family and friends didn’t support me enough this time. We were barely making it financially. It was either abortion or adoption. I thought about abortion first. It was painful but my friends and family (and StandUpGirl.com) helped me make the choice not to abort. I was so close to having an abortion. I felt things that I never thought I could feel over a pregnancy abortion choice (guilt, love, anger, depression, etc.)

I decided to give the baby up for adoption. My aunt (that I hate) wanted to take the baby. I didn’t want to see the baby often but I wanted to make sure my baby was being taken care of. I found out that I was having a boy. I was thinking, “I’m going to give my first baby boy away.” I was desparate as the months moved on to try to keep him. My aunt really didn’t do anything about it. Nothing was signed or anything. I was already attached to my baby and I knew that I couldn’t let him go.

I gained more confidence and self-esteem. I always said to myself, “You can do this Mya.” Well I did! I started 2 jobs and started making enough money to keep him. I just had Evan on November 14th, 2002. He is precious. It’s hard to think that I was going to take away his life just because I didn’t think I could raise him. Adoption would have been better than abortion, but I’m glad I got to keep him.

One thing I’ve learned: even though it’s hard, you can do it. Now I look at pregnancies as goals and blessings. Thank you Lord!
With love,

Mya

Dear Mya,

Wow! Congratulations on your new little boy. I’m happy to hear that things are going well. I found that although things were really hard for me at times, God lifted me up and gave me the strength I needed. Having and raising a child is a challenge, but it also brings such indescribable joy and fulfillment. I am very happy that I was given the chance to experience the blessing of being a mother. I don’t do things perfectly, but I trust that God will fill in the gaps where I’m lacking.

You and your family will be in my prayers.