hi. my name’s koda.

im 17 years old. i found out i was pregnant around april 2010. me and my bf have been together for 11&1/2 months now. i know this might sound kind of different, but me and my bf planned to have this baby. it started off as something great, and the thought of having this baby excited me. i thought i was ready and i thought i knew almost everything because of the experience i have with my nieces. turns out i was wrong. i don’t regret making the decision, but i know it should have been something that i could have waited on. now i feel alone and scared.

im still living with my mom, but im afraid. i’m having a son, and hes due december 5th. im not finished high school, and my boyfriend isnt either. im going on assistance, but this isnt how i saw my life. i always thought i would be married and done college before i had a baby. having a baby, having to finish high school and college and a start off a career all seems like so much. i hear about success stories all the time, and i always think i can do it, but when reality sets in, im afraid of being a failure, i want nothing but whats best for my son and i will do anything. my bf is going to be making income from his schooling, but im still worried things wont work out as planned.everyone is trying to tell me everything will be fine, i just cant seem to let my guard down and breathe easy about it.

Dear Koda, My name is Meg and I help Becky with her letters sometimes…Thank you for being honest and vulnerable.  When we are young and full of hormones we tend to make our own plans and expect to be the ONE who doesn’t get backfired on…we always say, ‘It wont happen to me, I am the exception’, etc…but then we find ourselves up creek without a paddle sometimes and reflect back and go, ‘well I guess maybe my parents were right, or well I guess that wasn’t the best idea’…some of those things we can turn from and be done with and some of the decisions we make are lifelong roads to walk on….the good thing is that if you have the wisdom to see now where you were wrong then that means you are going to be a GREAT mom…it takes a person of solid character to admit when they were wrong, it takes the love and heart of a mother to want what is best for their child….You have that heart and although maybe this was not the most ideal decision you are going to make not only the best of it but you will be one of those many success stories…I know it….I want to encourage you to take the EXPERIENCE youhave and share it with others who do not.   I am here for you, I would love to see a picture of your baby when your little guy is here….I am a December birthday as well….have you picked out names?….Much Love…Meg