I NEED HELP

I am a 29 yr old single mother of one and I just found out that I was Preg. right befor christmas. Now I would love to have my baby, but my situation is crazy. the guy I'm preg. from is married and don't want me to have the baby. Now this may sound easy, but it's not cause one part of me want to have my baby and one part don't so i don't know what to do. what if i get the abortion and then i go crazy,start hearing babys crying and kill my self inside for doing it. Or if I have her and can't take care or her the way i should .OR worse he get made cause I say I want to keep it and he kill me and the baby. This is all that is going through my mind and i only have 2 more weeks to chose witch way i'm going to go . WHAT AM I GOING TO DO?