I’m 18. I was forced to have an abortion and I regret it more than anything in this world.

I can’t study or do anything because I believe that I was meant to have this baby. I have a 23-year-old fiancé, and he has a job. He is a cooking chef. I want to ask him to try again and I know he will say yes. The thing is, if I decide to have a child now, I know I will be more than happy, but I will have no studies (I am an artist, a writer, and I have diplomas in singing so I’m sure I can find a job in that). Also, I will have to leave France and go to another country to raise my child as my fiancé cannot get a job in Paris so easily (it’s practically impossible). I know, and I feel it in my heart that this is the life I want, the life I need, but I’m still so scared to leave my family behind and everything. I’m so scared of making the wrong decision.

Can someone please give me their advice? I have no one to talk to :'( Please help me…