I Don’t Get a Do Over
There is help for women who are in a crisis pregnancy. If I had known of a resource like StandUpGirl.com in 1978 even though I was Pro-Choice, I would have chosen Life. All these years it has been a true heartbreak for me. The guilt I feel at having aborted my own Baby is horrible.
my lost baby

I am now a 64 year old woman and here is my sad story…
Years ago I unexpectedly got pregnant at a point in my life where I just didn’t know what to do and felt I couldn’t afford to support a baby on my own. I was extremely Pro-Choice at the time, influenced by my Mom in the years before Roe vs. Wade. I had an abortion at about 6 to 8 weeks pregnant. This was back in 1978.

When I went to the facility, I asked questions about the Baby, and I was told it was just a blob of tissue and it just didn’t feel anything anyway, no problem! The abortion was beyond a horrible experience, both mentally, physically; and really – even socially.

All these years it has been a true heartbreak for me. The guilt I feel at having murdered my own Baby is horrible. I have never told anyone about it because of my remorse and shame, with the exception of my husband I married in 2017.

I became a Christian in 2003, and my thoughts on abortion were certainly in disagreement with those beliefs initially. But with the advances in Science it really made the reversal in my belief on abortion. With the advances of knowing the baby feels pain, how early the heart beats, how quickly those little toes and fingers form, etc. my mind just could not agree with abortion. This is truly a Human Life right from the very beginning! Even more so, I was greatly upset to learn that the baby is NOT just a blob of tissue like I had been told. I was so upset! The Truth only added to my grief, and now I was angry too.

My morals and beliefs that this is a unique Human Unborn Baby with it’s very own DNA from the time of conception tells me this is a Human Life from the start. It is not a blob of tissue like they lied to me about. It is not a parasite as I saw some recently proclaim! This is your Unborn Child!

My belief is that many, if not most of the women having an abortion will have this remorse and grief. It has been lifelong for me, even when early on I was extremely Pro-Choice.

I know God has forgiven me, but I have not. I believe someday I will meet this Child in Heaven, and I love this child greatly; but I will have to ask for forgiveness from this Child I murdered. It can be called nothing less.

I have learned that these days there is help for women who have gotten unexpectedly pregnant. That is so wonderful! If I had known of a resource like that all those years ago, I believe, even as a Pro-Choice woman at the time, I would have chosen Life.

I DON’T GET A DO-OVER. I wish I could! But maybe I can warn these younger women of what may be in store for them and help them to know there really are other Choices.
There is help! Choose Life!

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