How To Tell Your Parents You’re Pregnant – Part 1

by | 2014 | Sisters Column

   Telling your parents that you’re pregnant can be one of the scariest moments during pregnancy.  Some parents don’t take the news well while others do, but it is hard to guess how your parents will react before you actually tell them.  If you are in a situation like this right now, just take a […]
StandUpGirl women looks at pregnancy test results

StandUpGirl women looks at pregnancy test results

   Telling your parents that you’re pregnant can be one of the scariest moments during pregnancy.  Some parents don’t take the news well while others do, but it is hard to guess how your parents will react before you actually tell them.  If you are in a situation like this right now, just take a deep breath and relax.  You will be able to get through it; your situation is not hopeless.    

Telling your parents that you’re pregnant is hard, but you can do it. 

Here is some advice that might make it easier for you. 

1.  Tell your parents in a calm manner. 
If you are calm, it will help them be calm and even if they react strongly, continue to remain calm.  Raising your voice or yelling back will only make the situation worse.  If they yell at you, try to be the bigger person by maintaining your composure. 

2.  Decide how you want to tell your parents that you’re pregnant. 
Consider telling them to their face.  This is the best way to have any type of conversation because a large part of communication is nonverbal.  If you feel you can’t tell them to their face, think about texting, FaceTiming, or emailing them.  And remember, don’t put the news that you’re pregnant up on Facebook or Twitter before letting your parents know.  It could be very hurtful to them if you’ve told all your friends beforehand. 
You should also consider if you should have your boyfriend there when you tell them.  Having your boyfriend there may be a huge support to you; however, if your parents do not like him, it could just make things worse.  There is no right or wrong answer to whether or not your boyfriend should be there, just use your best judgment. 

3.  When you break the news to them, explain to them how you intend to take care of your child. 
Having a plan and being ready to share it with your parents will let them know that you are responsible to care for your child and that you have this under control.  It will be a relief to them.  Your plan may not work out in the end as you had intended, but what is most important is that they know you’ve got this under control.  If you need help making a plan for how you will provide for your baby, I suggest that you talk to your local Pregnancy Resource Center.  Pregnancy Resource Centers help women with unexpected pregnancies for free.  They can provide car seats, strollers, formula, baby bottles, diapers, and more.  It is a free resource that is available to you.  Take advantage of it!  You can find the Pregnancy Resource Center that is closest to you by calling 1-800-712-HELP or by going to Optionline.org.

4.  After you’ve told them, give them space. 
Your parents will need some time to process the news that you’re pregnant.  The length of time they need varies, so it might be something that you will just have to play-by-ear.  Giving them space will give them the chance to cool down and not take it out on you.  If you think you’ll need to, make plans to stay with a friend until things settle down with your parents. 

5.  No matter how they react, remember that your parents love you. 
Things might be rough for a while in your relationship with them, but just know what in time things will go back to normal.  Many women fear their parents will no longer be proud of them.  It will take time to earn their trust back but you can do that by showing them that you are an excellent and responsible parent. 

Telling your parents that you’re pregnant, is just really, really difficult.  It is ok to be afraid and scared; it’s normal.  If you feel scared, acknowledge the fear, and tell your parents even while you are afraid.  For many women this is the most difficult part of their unexpected pregnancy and once they have faced it, things begin getting a lot better. 

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