couple of months have passed, i'm 14 now. i've decided for sure i want a baby. i wanna love somebody of my own. people don't realize how hard it is. i want a baby for myself. someone to have and hold. i've been thinking alot about this. my mom thinks im dumb to think about tha stuff at my age. i cant help it. i try so hard to erase it outta my mind . i know its gonna change all my future plans for college and job as an actress. i just dont know what to do anymore. im about to break down and give up.