I guess that some things are just not meant to be… like me and pregnancy. Why won’t things just work out the way that I want it to? I am so desperate right now. Desperate and miserable. God knows I want a baby so badly and it just doesn’t want to happen, no matter how hard I try, I don’t fall pregnant.

There were no physical complications after the abortion, so I’m at my wits end trying to figure out why I’m not conceiving. Is it because I want it so desperately? Or because I’m being punished for my past mistakes? Is it because I’m just not meant to be a mother?

I feel like I’m busy going around and around and around in circles. I don’t know how many more negative hpts I can survive.
F@ck I’m so depressed.