I have become so convincing with the mask i wear. Can anyone else relate to this? Anyone ever wish there was a place where you could actually take the “Life is fine. Things are fine. I am fine” mask off and just be REAL? and all without being judged or feeling like a failure? Well, there is… i understand the pain of having feelings eating away at you inside, but being afraid to let them out. I’m here anytime for you guys. You can always be real with me. Let’s leave the masks for halloween.
“Thousands of tears from the sky beat against my skin… I’m wonderin’ why. Why on earth am I here?? No one sees what i’m feelin’.. They all trust me, but have no reason.. It’s cold like death, but i’m still breathin’. Fallin’ into nothing; grasping for anything; beggin’ for someone; but no one’s listening.
Do they see me slippin’ away? Feel me growin’ cold? I’m puttin’ on the performance of a lifetime. I doubt they’ll ever know. That i feel this rage, this pain, this guilt… And over what?? All problems seem to lie within myself.
Do they see beneath the smile, the lines my tears have made? Do they notice the sparkle in my eyes, how it’s faded into grey? Bet they’d never guess, that though I do my very best, i’m jsut as jacked up, screwed up, chained up, and beat up as the rest. No longer the perfect, innocent, angelic girl they all expect to see. So many mistakes… If they only knew the darkness that lurks inside of me. Beggin’ for a hero to save whatever I have left… to breathe life into my lungs, pump hope into my veins… save me from this living death.”