Letters to a dear sister  <3 '

 

           Dear Aunicaa  , life wasn't the same when I found out I was pregnant.On November 24 I missed my period. That day felt a bit different from other days. I wasn't sure why. It felt....different.I was afraid that I was pregnant. It was just five after I had intercourse.My menstrual cycle was regular.I didn't think pregnancy would work that fast.So I waited. And wasted time.I had to at least wait one more week.I didn't understand.I told my boyfriend of nearly 3 years that I wasn't ovulating.The condom broke. Everything had flown out and inside of me.I take online tests to know when I'm ovulating since it comes a few days late. Prior to that, I was having symptoms of pregnancy. It turns out I was VERY fertile when it all occurred.I was very fatigued and I had frequent urination.My breasts were very tender and hard. I thought it was the weather since I live in New York. But then , when I got inside they were still hurting. Everything that came my way seemed to smell very bad. Like perfume. And I love perfume!I was so scared to take a test.I went to Urban Health Plan so I can get some prenatal care for my baby.That's if I was pregnant. I went to see my doctor. I wouldn't give them my name.They allowed me to see my doctor. They told me to pee in a cup and draw some blood. I also wanted to take an STD test because you may never know.I lingered around the room lurking to find any information that might be suitable for pregnant women.Soon enough,my doctor came in.

                                       "Rachelle,can you sit down with me for a second?" She asked. "Of course,well do you know if I'm pregnant yet?" I was so nervous I stumbled upon some words. "The tests aren't ready yet,but I'll need to take a cheek swab and some mucus. There are some clothing in the back waiting for you. I can't check you with tight clothing." She slapped some tight umbra gloves on. "Will this hurt?" A tear fell from my eye. I looked up at the ceiling from above. "Not at all. But I do need to ask you a few questions." She penetrated a little Q-tip inside. "When was your last period?" I yelped. "Your hurting me a little bit." I squealed sliding from the chair a little bit. "The tests are ready in the lab waiting for you, Doctor Vaughn. I was apprehensive for a bit. But I have to know. "I'll be right out." She responded. The nurse shut the door tight. "Rachelle,do you know when you had intercourse with your partner?" She removed her gloves and automatically washed her hands. She sat down and pulled a stool up. "It was in October. The beginning,on our anniversary." She nodded. "Did he ejaculate inside of you." I was embarrassed. A tear fell out of my left eye. I knew my boyfriend's mother would be very upset if my boyfriend was having a baby with me.She liked me very much, but I knew she wouldn't agree to let me keep him. "He did.Am I allowed to know the results yet?" I looked at her,putting my hand to my face and she handed me a tissue to wipe my tears away. "Don't cry,everything will be okay.How long ago was this?Should I meet the young man?" She suggested. "No,please don't.We had sex five weeks ago.I think it's to early to tell." I responded. "Well,not exactly,even though you missed your period once it can be different for you. Different women have different bodies.You know that right?" I nodded. "Do you think I might be pregnant, Ms. Vaughn?" I looked up at her and gazed into her eyes.  "Well,there could be a possibility." The nurse walked in. "Well,how are you ladies doing on the beautiful morning?" I bit my lip a little. She had a booklet in her hand. I tried following the words by tilting my head a little.But it couldn't figure it out. "Well,Rachelle we tested your blood.And,it turns out we found hcg." I was in shock. My eyes got wide. She handed me a book full of obstetricians,gynecologists and nutritionists. "Well,lay back a little.This will prove if the test is accurate." I fell back into the chair. She rubbed some gel on my tummy and did a sonogram. I was pregnant,young and didn't know what to do...How was I suppose to take care of my baby? "Would you like to consider abortion?" She recommended. "I would never."

 

                                                                                                          - Sincerely , Rae <3 '

 

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