I really don' t know what happen. I can't believe how dumb i waz. Im having a lot of trouble with 1 baby. Nobody is helping me. My mom is over working now. I havn't heard a word from my dad since he left us and i was scared my baby wouldn't have a crib to sleep in.
My baby daddy from my first baby Linda is in jail and im praying im not pregnent. If i am pregnent i don't know what i could do really. If i am pregnent this baby daddy is differnt i hope. Funny how before all this pregnent thing i used to be the one saying "IM mature i can't take care of myself and i would NEVER be like my friends" now im in a worse possition them most of them. Most of them have their baby daddy helping them or thier family. Me. I do online schooling wich is hard at times 2 but it helps. I have to go baby sit somebody eles kids for money while taking care of my own baby. I do thinks i can do to help me get a little big of money. My mom does give me some but not enough. Now that im a mom i look at my mom and i say "im never going to be like her or my dad" im NEVER going to leave my child. Really Im scared. At times im like why am i scared. and my sister told me "its because moms are scared" maybe shes right. BUt really i don't know what to do. Im scared and now im wishing to go back in time and change but i can't. I only had 1 life and i chose to go in the wrong dierection. My friends don't call or stop by. And im not going to theire house because i can't they can come and they chose not too. I also heard people tell me that they talk behind my back. I cna't imgine all the things thel say if i really am pregnent agine but what can i do about it really. im 1 person and their a million of them. All i can do is hold my chin up. I don't reget having Linda shes the best thing in my life but how can i raise 2?