In the morning i woke up with a bad dream.. in my dreams., i took 2 pregnancy test (a digital and a strip one) it says "NEGATIVE" then because of the result., i will not be able to carry a child anymore., (T_T)
i know it's weird but it affect me so much., coz last night i keep on watching on the you-tube .. girls who are taking pregnancy test and got a "POSITIVE" and their so much happiness with the positive result.,
then on the afternoon., i went to my friend's house.. visiting her and her baby MIGGY! then Harold fetch me there then i was telling him about my bad dream.. and we decided to bought PREGNANCY TEST! (which is not planned coz our plan taking the test will be tomorrow FRIDAY) because im being paranoid., so we went to his place then i took the test in their bathroom.. then i had "NEGATIVE" (T_T) when i went out., i gave test the result to Harold and i never talked again., i keep myself silent.. wondering what's my wrong.. something like that are we not meant for each other.. so Harold ask me.. am i ok? then i said YES! im good.. he told that he knew me that i am not good., so i never talked again., then he brought me out with some friends.. then he bought 1 MUCHO OF RED HORSE (mucho means big bottle and red horse is beer) he told me that we will drink.. one-on-one .. so i can forget all of my wanderings.. with the result.. so he keep on talking to me telling me not to RUSH myself coz we are not in rush., and calm myself.. do not stress myself too much for my wants.. do not hope to much.. we are just waiting.. i should be relaxed and he was trying to make me smile., where he wins my SMILE.. ;) he told me that he was also upset but he do not want to be sad for me he is making himself strong., then he kissed me then hug me.. (all the time)
OMG! and i find myself now so much HAPPY.. now I really really proud to say to the whole world that "I HAD THE BEST AMONG THE BEST BOYFRIEND EVER" i am so lucky to have him., ;) he understands me., he loves me so much.. i find myself like his PRINCESS where he take good care of., ;) i find myself like HIS GOLD that he don't want to be stain..
I LOVE HIM SO MUCH! i made a promised to hm that i will be ok! from now on i will hot hope so much., but now i still have my hopes but not much.. i have hopes until i never get my period., ;)