Im Amanda J(18yrs. old), Im a freashman in college and this is MY STORy. 2004 my freshman year in high school, i was ready and excited. i meet this guy who i feel in love with and after a month he took my virginity. Our relationship was strong and everything was good. In Feb.2005 i noticed that i hadn't had my period but never thought anything of it cause i hated my period anyway. I had went to a party in the end of feb. and ate so much food so the next morning it was no surprise that i woke up sick to my stomach. I thought i had food Poising.... but i was wrong. In March me and my boyfriend broke up but were messing around. One day at his house i told him i thought i was pregnant and he cursed me out, called me a lie and all kind of stuff. i sat their and cried. Skipping ahead, i had really bad morning sickness and one morning my mother was late for work and she caught me throwing up in my room cause i couldn't make it to the bathroom. she asked me did i need a doctor i told her no , she asked me was i pregnant i told her no she asked me again and i said yes. She stormed out of my room called her job told them she wasn't coming to work. She came back and told me you messed up big time, now i gotta fork our money for you to have an abortion and that was that, i had no say so. She told me not to tell my ex but i did. all he could do was look at me as i cried. When i got home that day all i did was sit inside and cry, i told my mom i didn't want to have an abortion and she said well your gonna have to tell everyone and i was 14 so i knew people would talk about me and my family would be mad at me and i really didn't have any guidence so i felt alone. my dad or any of my family ever knew. It was the end of school and two days later i had the abortion. When they did the ultra sound all i could do was look away cause i was so scared i didn't know what would happen. I was 3months pregnant. all i remember is when they rolled me out of that room after it was done, all i could do was cry and ask why . To this day it is still hard for me. i feel an empty space in my heart and i don't know how to deal with it. Me and my ex were still messin around up until 12th grade. We are friends now and he's the only connection i feel that i have to my baby. everytime i look at a picture of us i think about our child, i wounder what it was (girl or boy) everytime i see a pregnant woman i want to ball tear. everytime i see a baby i get sad. i feel i'll never be right until i have a child of my own and i really can't do that now because im in college but then i look at all these other teenage mother who are making it and it's an inspiration. but still who gets pregnant just to do it. I just don't want anyone to go through this situation. it's not worth it. Just today in my public speaking class a girl gave a speech on Abortion and it hurt me to my soul. She made it clear that Abortion isn't an easy way out..... i could have easily given my child up for adoption. It sucks so bad to be in this situation still. But i pray that i make it and i pray that no one chooses this road cause it's not an easy one .

Comments (0)

There are no comments posted here yet

Need Help?

standupgirl contact becky

Search Real Stories

Share your story on StandUpGirl

Get 24 hour live support!
Optionline chat

StandUpGuy Story by Kyle

standupgirl app

Translate Our Page


StandUpGirl Login

Welcome to StandUpGirl