black and white sadI am currently 17 and when I was 15 I got pregnant. I was with a guy who I thought I was deeply in love with and I still am. I thought I was pregnant so instead of telling my mom I told a social worker at school. She asked if I wanted to go to the clinic I said yes.

I went to find my bf at the time and I found him smoking a joint. I told him what was going on and he laughed and said I was lieing and just to go prove to myself I wasn’t pregnant.


So I went to the clinic and took a pregnancy test and well… I was pregnant. He told me he wanted me to go to the hospital and get blood work done and a pelvic exam because I was already 4 weeks. I went back to school and showed him the papers. He didn’t really care. I asked him again to come and he said he didn’t like hospitals. I  told him to come up to the school to talk to me about it.

We were in the hall and I started crying and begging him to come. He started getting mad and punched me in the mouth. I fell to the ground and I was so scared I couldn’t move. The principal came and talked to us.

After I got my test and things done we decided to tell our parents. I was due June 28th, 2006. We told them on Oct.31st.

One day, my boy friend came over all bruised. His dad had hit him. He was high on coke and crack. I kicked him out that day as he was living with me since I was pregnant.

I got an abortion at 6 and a half weeks. I hate myself and everyday I wake up wondering what I did. I attempted suicide many times. I still can’t even look at him even though I see him every day. I just want to let girls know that no matter what, you can make it through with or without your man by your side.

Don’t take the easy way out.