Why shouldnt I love him

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  • #19061
    AvatarRonnieBo

    I ear all the time that a mother cant love a baby concieved by rape and Im at the point where I dont think I want anyone to know how my son came about but I wish people would stop saying stuff like that.How is my son going to cope with people thinking he should have been aborted.I love him and I think thats all that matters.I dont hate him because of what his dad did and I dont see why I should.I am not going to explain why my son is only 13 years younger than me even if people think i am a slut.My only problem is how the people who have to know will treat him.My aunt and unce that I live with apperantly dont want to be in the same room with him.Anyone else have this problem or advice on how to deal.

    #19065
    AvatarloveU

    No one has the right to say your baby should have been aborted or given up for adoption. Some mothers can’t handle having a baby concieved through rape but if you can then no one should look down on you or your son. I am proud of you for giving your baby life in the worst of circumstances. I love my daughter to death and I couldn’t imagine hating her for any reason in the world especially one she had no control over. Tell people if they can’t love your baby for who he is they deserve no part in his life. How horrible his own family to act that way towards him. Have you tried to talk to them about it and tell them that it bothers you that they act this way? If they don’t stop is there anywhere else you can go? If you need to talk you can E-Mail me at jessica7607@Gmail.com

    #19072
    Avatarnadza

    i think ur right its not the babys fault that he came into the world the way he did and he has the right to be loved… i think u should get urself and ur son out of such a negative atmosphere but if u hav no where else to go then stay positive as u can i think ur a great mom for doing what ur doing….

    #19073
    Avatarbreathless

    Way to go for giving your baby life, he is your child and for no reason should the way he was conceived change the way you love him for any reason. To think that children conceived in rape is to think that their lives have no worth and that is so far from the truth. How awful your own family cannot see how strong and beautiful both you and and your child are. I agree with what loveU said, if they can’t love him for who he is then THEY are the ones that don’t deserve to be in his life, not the other way around. I am so happy you gave him life and now love, what an amazing person you are. I wish you and your son a life of happiness and I hope you will get through these hard times sooner than later. There are also lots of support out there, people who are there to help with situations like these, maybe educate your family a little more…Look into these options for you and your baby 🙂
    And of course, we girls (and some guys) here at standupgirl are ALL here to help and offer our support so never be afraid to reach out for help!!

    Lots of love,
    Anna

    #19077
    Avatarkez_mummy_2_skye

    you have the right way of bringing up your son and he doesnt need to know how he was conceived, the man thing he is here and healthy and ur doing a great job.

    #19081
    AvatarMrsTWalsh

    How a child was conceived has no reflection on who they are as a person. Shame on your aunt and uncle. I truly hope that they will allow their eyes to open and see that this baby has no control over how he was conceived and that he is completely innocent.

    #19321
    Avatarrocky51

    first of all, i have to give you major props for keeping that baby!!! especially when you were only 13.

    i dont think there is anyreason not to love him. ya he is "part" of a "rapist" but that baby grew inside of you and your raising him…its not like he is going to be a rapist when he gets older.

    tell eveyone to go suck it when they say something like that.
    haha jk

    #19325
    Avatarnishab98

    I agree how your child was concieved has no baring on what type of person he/he will be. I think what matters most is that you love your baby regardless what the circumstances are! You havemade the first step by keeping your baby and that says alot 😉 I wish you and your family the best

    #19413
    AvatarAnonymous

    your story is very moving, you are wise beyond your years! all the love your child needs is you! dont forget that! You can be his 100%… just becuase others may not have the same ideas and their morals are misconstruded, you can be his solice and his support. He can find a haven of love within you…. I wish there were more people out there like you! Enojy your son!

    #19672
    AvatarMissMyKidz

    I totally agree with you. Two of my babies were a product of rape. Granted I lost both of them but I still love them. I still cry myself to sleep at night because I don’t know what they would be like right now. I hated the circumstances and I didn’t want them but the longer they were a reality the more I grew to love them. I think about the both daily and wish they were here so I could snuggle with them and show them how much I really do love them, even though all I have are imagined babies to think of them as. Though people say it, it really is not true and don’t let them convince you other wise. By the way, Congratulations on your son. Treasure him like nothing else girl! Love ya

    #19674
    Avatarlifeandmusic8975

    no one has a right to treat your baby that way!! Especially not his own family! I hope that they realize someday that they could potentially make an extreme impact on how he feels about himself. He has every right to be happy!! You are a wonderful mother and just make sure you always make him feel loved since he may not get it from anyone else!! Good luck and I will be praying for you. If you need to talk to someone please feel free to email me lifeandmusic8975@yahoo.com

    #19675
    Avataramericanamelie

    all children are a blessing. no exceptions, period. you are that child’s mother, and it is up to you to love your baby unconditionaly. 🙂 Youre rape was a tragedy, but your baby isnt. Just because sex is supposed to be a consensual act doesnt make your baby an abomination. it will take a certain level of maturity to stand up to those people and tell them that this baby is a JOY, just as all babies are. Stand up for that child; it will be years before he will be able to stand up for himself!
    my heart is with you through this hard time. even though i chose to have sex, my family cant look at this pregnancy without sadness. That’s actually part of the reason I have chosen adoption– this baby deserves to be treated like a joy and blessing by everyone around him/her. I dont blame them though, just as you shouldnt. this is a hard adjustment for all that love you and hate what was done to you.
    youre in my prayers.

    #19689
    AvatarMonicathree

    Isn’t it just like God to, out of something as tragic and brutal as rape, bring something so innocent and pure and full of love just for you. I know that many women who abort after rape actually compound their pain. Cause if you think about it, now, out of this horrible and violent act, another horrible and violent act is being commited.

    You are amazingly insightful! When you look at a baby in ultra sound or a picture of fetal development, you can’t tell if how the baby was conceived, whether it was on a honeymoon marital bed, the back seat of a car, in the park, or from a horrible thing like abuse or rape…what is obvious is that it is a person…a unique person!!

    We can’t discriminate against people cause of their origins…you know that is a very slippery slope that is what Hitler, the KKK, and nazis and the like do:ohmy: ….

    Take care all!!! I will say a special prayer intention for you.

    I also agree that the child does not need to know about the rape.

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