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February 20, 2008 at 8:03 am #20445CourtneyMichelle
Hey girls, my name is Courtney if you didn’t already know. I’m 19 years old and I’ve decided to wait to have a baby. But there’s a problem, and I’ve been trying to hold it off for as long as possible. I think I MIGHT be pregnant, but I didn’t want to keep thinking about it so much that it makes everything worse. I’m just hoping to get some advice/input on what you girls think these "symptoms" might mean before I decide to do something about it. 🙂
So last week I was supposed to have my period, but I had two days of brown spotting instead. Some other things are..
– Nausia after I eat
– Bloated (I’m NEVER bloated when I don’t have my period)
– Light cramps/pain in my lower stomach
– Some white discharge (sorry… haha)
– Extremely emotional, caught myself on the verge of tears for absolutely no reason I can think of, haha
– Really tired after eating… or anything.
– Breaking out all over my face?? I don’t know if that’s a symptom but it’s a lot worse than it usually is.
– BUT my breasts are not feeling different, just a little bigger (I don’t have much of anything there in the first place, lol).
*I’m afraid to buy a hpt, just because I’ve bought many in the past, thinking I was pregnant, and they were ALL negative. But this time, most of the symptoms I’m having now are different, but feel like I should be pregnant. If anyone wants to give their input or advice I would REALLY appreciate it. Thank you girls!!!
XOXO CourtneyFebruary 20, 2008 at 9:05 am #20447queenB
The only way to know for sure is to take a pregnancy test. You can call 1-800-395-4357 and they can hook you up with a free and confidential pregnancy test.
White discharge is not a usual sign of pregnancy; however, among other things, it can be a symptom of a sexually transmitted disease (STD). I would make an appointment with your doctor right away to get checked out.
Have you considered waiting until marriage to have sex? You are special and so is your body. You owe it to yourself and to your future to wait until you are married to have sex. And if you really love the guy that you are with now, there is a chance that you will get married. You may already be planning on marring him. If that is the case, why have sex now and take a risk when you have the rest of your life to have sex with him?February 20, 2008 at 11:35 pm #20457CourtneyMichelle
Hey thank you for the advice, but I know for sure that I don’t have an STD. Some things I left out were thirst and headaches. I don’t know, I’m probably not pregnant, I just wanted to see what others would think.
My boyfriend and I were actually talking about getting married the other day in a couple of years. I don’t think us having sex is a problem. We don’t make a big deal out of it, and it doesn’t effect our relationship. However, sometimes being pregnant/thinking I’m pregnant crosses my mind. We’ve talked about a lot of things together. We don’t have any problems with sex or our relationship, so that part is okay.
I guess I’ll have to take a test sooner or later. I’m trying not to think about it though. But thank you for your input, I really appreciate it!
Xoxo CourtneyFebruary 21, 2008 at 3:56 am #20460Meg11
Hey Courtney, I think it is exciting to talk about marriage and to head that direction and from the sounds of it that could be reality in the near future, How long have you been with him?? Some of the symptoms you named can very well be pregnancy symptoms but can also be attributed to other things such as diet, anemia, and natural hormone changes…our bodies don’t only change at puberty but they continue to change until we die…I would for sure go to the doctor just to ensure your health, tiredness and thirst can be from anemia where you have an iron deficiency and the other symptoms if not caused my pregnancy could be a chemical imbalance…I think what queenB was talking about when she mentioned waiting for marriage is that until you have that ring on your finger with an I DO nothing is for certain…I was engaged for over a year and already had a child with one of my ex’s when we split up, also a friend of mine was engaged and living with her soon to be husband when they got pregnant, they postponed the wedding due to her wanting to fit into her dress and never ended up getting married, once a baby is here then the money gets tighter and the stress level rises and especially for women we tend to change dramatically even during pregnancy and much more after birth, I am not aiming this next comment at your boyfriend but at guys in general from my own experiences but a lot of times we tend to think certain things our guys do are cute or we are ok with certain choices and behaviors acted on by them but once a baby comes into the picture and we have developed this strong maternal bond for our children we tend to not think what they do is ok and it causes a lot of fighting and it can tear a relationship apart….as an example there are some guys who like to play video games and smoke pot a lot, that is fine and dandy until you are pregnant and need him to get a job and not spend his money on weed but diapers, that happened to me with my daughters dad…I loved hanging out with him all day and getting stoned but once I was pregnant and then once the baby was born it was not so fun anymore…make sure that you guys are on the same page with these things before getting married and having babies…I guess in one sense you are already married, to become one (have sex) with another person binds you to them and in God’s eyes once you do that you are married, the difference is that it is not legal because you have not been recognized in the courts eyes as a married couple…but in Gods eyes you are married and if you two split up then it is just as bad as divorce in God’s eyes…what you can do though to benefit yourselves and to honor what is right is you can get legally married in the courts eyes and then save up for that big wedding that you cannot afford right now…I know people who have done that, I guess one way I look at it is this, the "typical" wedding is the bride wears a white dress symbolizing purity/virginity, she stands with her groom before God and men and they vow their love and commitment to one another until death and they celebrate with food and drinks and sometimes dancing, it is a real fun time at weddings…then they go off in a car that everyone draws on with shoe polish and attaches cans to the bumper,etc…they go to the honeymoon sweet to do what??? Have sex, right?? Well what is the fun in doing all of that when you have already had sex?? sure it is picture perfect to be in wedding clothes and people will look at you and ohh and ahh on your way to the room but there is nothing kept secret for that moment, I was not a virgin when I got married, it is a rare thing anymore but I had kept my body a secret to my husband and his to me, we waited until our wedding night and it was worth the wait, we had something to share that we had not yet known about each other and it was more than just a thing you do on your wedding night, it was a special moment where we got to reap the reward of our waiting….like I said I was not a virgin but it was the most memorable sexual moment of my life…now you can say that you have already had sex so what is the point of stopping now?? I had a friend who found herself in that spot…she ended up pregnant, they decided to get married but our pastor said he wouldn’t perform the ceremony unless they remained abstinent until their wedding night…she was pregnant and had all the reason to say, why stop having sex?? But they listened and waited until their wedding night and she told me that she was really shocked at how different it was to separate for that time and season and then come back together on their wedding night, she said it was as though it was their first time all over again and that it was so worth it…now don’t take offense at my saying any of this because I have not one finger to point at anyone who has had or is having sex before marriage but I have experienced both sides now, I remained abstinent for 2 1/2 years until my wedding night but I already had two kids from two dads and had been sexually active for ten years…the choice is yours but so are the consequences…I still live with mine…I guess if nothing else it will reveal your boyfriends true colors, can he go the next two years without sex?? Are you worth waiting for to him?? If he can’t wait for your wedding night to have sex with you will he wait if you are on bedrest for the last two months of pregnancy and then for the next 6 weeks following birth?? You are old enough to get married without your parents permission, if he is the one and you know it go to the court house and pay 50 bucks for a marriage license, stand before the justice of the peace, then save up for that dream wedding but know that you are having sex in marriage not out of it…if you are not ready for marriage yet then you should really take a step back form having sex, you mention that it doesn’t affect your relationship, well it should, sex isn’t something to just taken for granted, it should be a part of a marriage relationship that brings strength and bonding, and to say you don’t make a big deal out of it just shows that you are not getting from it what you are meant to and I don’t think people do unless they are married, it binds your souls to one another and causes the two to become one, if you are doing it outside of marriage then you are selling yourself short of the blessings that come from it….You are more than entitled to disagree with me but I know the difference between sex before and in marriage…there is a cause and effect to everything and I have found much better, healthier, and pleasurable effects with sex in marriage then outside of it…Love MegFebruary 21, 2008 at 8:30 am #20464CourtneyMichelle
Hey Meg, thank you for what you said. It makes me think a lot about my relationship, but not in a bad way. It’s in a completely good way. When I said "we don’t make a big deal out of it," I think that came out wrong. It’s hard for me to explain it. Everytime we have sex we don’t take it for granted at all, it’s amazing everytime, and in the form of love, not just pleasure. I’ve NEVER thought about marrying anyone else in my life, and I’ve had a number of men in my life. It honestly feels like everytime I see him, that it’s a "new" love, but we’re so comfortable at the same time. I would get a marriage license in a heartbeat knowing I would be married to him. We’re ready to start our lives together, but we’re trying to take it one step at a time. I know a lot of people that have already been through what I’m going through, and a lot of them say "oh you never know what can happen." And they’re right, but nobody knows how much we love each other unless they’re us. I’ve had that "oh no I’m pregnant" problem with another boyfriend.. who was EXTREMELY abusive and a drug addict – who in turn got me addicted to drugs. And when that happened, I was so unhappy and I never would want a baby with him. And for some reason I thought I loved him, but why wouldn’t I want his baby if I DID love him?? If I end up pregnant with my boyfriend now, I trust him completely and I would never think twice about having it. I’m only 19, but both of us have been through a lot of things, and we’re not joking around because it’s some sort of young irresponsible love. It’s completely real and we’re ready to grow up. We went through that whole phase a long time ago. I’m almost two years sober, and I’ve been with him for a year and a month. He was/is the best thing that has EVER happened to me. I couldn’t be more happy right now, and marrying him would just increase that happiness. I’m not saying I’m ready for a baby, but I’ll ALWAYS take responsiblity for my actions. I know my boyfriend feels the same, I can see it in his eyes and I trust him completely. He is a genuinely responsible/trustworthy/funny/real person I’ve ever met. I couldn’t ask for more from him for anything. I know exactly what you are saying to me, and I take in everything openly. I’m not a secretive person and I will always be honest. I really appreciate what you’ve said and you giving your time to help me out. Thank you so much. I’ll let you know what happens.
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