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    🙁 well its been 8 months since my abortion and i still can’t get over it, i know that its not something that you just get over but its something that u learn to deal with. Accept. i just can’t stop thinking about it, usually only during my period and when i see other pregnant people or people with little babies, plus a friend of mind just announced that her and her husband are planning for a baby. i don’t think i’ll be able to be around her pregnant. its a lot to handle. the wanting especially because i truly did want it. i don’t know what to do. any advice


    I have never had an abortion myself, but I know people who have and I understand the pain you are feeling. I would reccommend post abortion counseling such as Project Rachael. Also talking with others who have gone through similar experiences and are dealing with the same feelings and emotions might be helpful. Does your friend know about your past abortion? Perhaps you could speak with her about your feelings and explain why it is hard for you to be involved with her pregnancy. Unfortunately it is not possible to change the past, but the future is open for different options and different choices. I hope that in time you will experience healing and the pain will lessen. In the meantime, if you need to talk there are plenty of people here (including me) that are glad to listen and offer support. Best Wishes.



    My friend mariah had an abortion and its taking a toll on her and her life. i haven’t been through ne nor will i. your decision was your own but it hurts me to read how sad u are when u see other preggos or peopel with babies. i am so sorry but i know its something that might take a support group to help you throught his trial in your life. and remember god is there for u even though u cant see him u can talkto hima nd lean on him. much love to you


    I know exactly what you are going through. Whe I read what you wrote, I felt like I was reading something I had written. I had an abortion in April and I regret it everyday. I feel so horrible about it. It hurts even worse because I did want the baby too. I just had someone telling me to have an abortion and unfortunately I listened to them instead of myself. My best friend and her husband are also trying to have a baby. I don’t hardly want to talk to her anymore and can’t imagine how it’ll be once she really is pregnant. I just feel like I’m not getting any better. They say things heal with time but I think about it constantly. It has really consumed my thoughts and is really depressing.


    Dearest "Blu22" my name is Lisa and I am from the Stand Up Girl website and letters like yours stand out to me because I know exactly what you are feeling. I know the grief, the shame, sorrow and the remorse. That empty place in your heart and in your arms that NOTHING can fill. Nothing deems to take that ache away. Another difficult part after abortion is actually sharing the pain. Not being able to put the pain to words and then when you share it … there are absolutely wonderful precious women that love you and are sympathetic. But only if you could talk to someone that has been there and is just as familiar with the pain as you are.

    Well my friend – as other girls that have written to you, my heart so goes out to you. I have had an abortion in my past also. Unfortunately – I have had 2. You would think that the pain of the first one would have been enough to keep me from doing it again – but it wasn’t. :blush:

    I’m so sorry about your heartache, but can I say that it is real and you have every right to weep. This is actually a good thing for you. But also something that is so very important is for you to find healing. To find a place where you can go and share with other women like you and me who have experienced abortion, have remorse and want freedom. Don’t wait for so many years like I did. All I did was bury the pain – and it didn’t go away.

    I went through a book called "Forgiven and Set Free" written by Linda Cochran and I have to tell you it was an amazing tool of healing for me. What I can do is copy a link for you to go to and you can try to locate a post abortion group in your area. Please, I know this step can be scary – but know that whoever answers the phone on the other end is usually a girl just like you and like me. Someone that has gone through an abortion – yet she has found healing and forgiveness and she is there to share what she has found with hurting girls like you. OK? OK. 🙂

    Here is the website:

    If you can’t locate anything – just send an e-mail on the "Dear Becky" webpage and put "Dear Lisa" and I will get your e-mail. I would be happy to help you locate a place that is close to you where you can find other women to comfort you in your grief like I did.

    Please also feel free to e-mail me any time on the website. I’d be very happy to help you in any way I can.

    Take care my friend and please know that your pain is very real and let’s find you some healing soon.

    Luv Lisa

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