This topic contains 3 replies, has 4 voices, and was last updated by Brenda Simons .
- April 25, 2007 at 1:04 pm #17076
My daughters father has decided that he doesn’t want any part of my her life. He has a girlfriend and another daughter who is only 2 months older than my daughter. When I got pregnant I did not know he had a girlfriend or that she was pregnant. Anyways the point is that he takes very good care of his other daughter and hasent even once seen mine and shes a month old. I just don’t know what to do with this situation. Can anyone give me advice I really need it.April 26, 2007 at 12:50 am #17081
This might sound kind of crazy because it’s not the norm, but I’d contact the girlfriend and be up front, but nice. Tell her you’re sorry (if you are) about having had an "affair" with him since you knew nothing of her at the time. Tell her you don’t want him for yourself, but you’d like him to be a dad to your baby, both financially and emotionally, and you need her help. After all, her baby and yours are half siblings. Tell her for the benefit of both of your children that you’d like to form an alliance with her, if not a friendship. But, who knows, you may end up becoming great friends. You can support each other through all the things that come with motherhood: babysitting, illness, milestones, etc. I think if you approach her with the right attitude and keep your anger with him in check, it could be really good for all involved. Remind her that despite her hurt and anger towards you, your baby and hers don’t deserve to be punished by not knowing each other (and yours being supported by a father). Even if it doesn’t work, it can’t be said that you didn’t try, and give her time to warm up to the idea. It may take some time for her to give it a shot initially. Good luck to you. I hope it works out for all involved.April 26, 2007 at 2:34 am #17084
I’m not at all familiar with the laws in the States but maybe you can consult someone about this especially if he admits that your baby is his. If he doesn’t then you could ask for a paternity test. Sorry but those things are just unfamiliar to me.
On the other hand…
Honey, I really am sorry to say this, but it may be time to move on. At least take stock of what you want. Do you want him back in your life or do you want him to be responsible at least in some way with your baby? You may wanna consider the fact that he was having sex with the two of you girlfriends and he might not have even completely dried off from one of you when he was already inside the other girl. Sorry to be harsh but here’s my point: Do you really want a guy like this in your lives? Though I’m normally for letting a child know his/her father because I sincerely believe that a person deserves a father and a mother, if a father is so downright lousy, then maybe your baby is better off without knowing him. This, of course, is your decision completely.
I would advise you to get in contact with mommytoele. She’s had some problems with the father of her child and she’s been battling it out for her baby’s sake. She is one incredibly amazing woman and she’s gorgeous, too. Hehe.
Seriously though, I am very impressed with her because she took control of her life for her daughter’s sake and she didn’t let her problems with her child’s father get in the way of being a good mother. That’s what you really need to do know.
Pray a lot. You certainly need it now. Be strong because your baby needs you to be strong for the both of you.
ErickApril 27, 2007 at 7:30 am #17103
child support!! hit him up for it….that’s all i have to say
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