my life after February the 5th

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    as you know, i gave birth to my precious daughters Angelina & Jana Ina on February the 5th, 19 weeks early..

    sadly after 12 hours of living Ina passed away.. her body was just to weak and tiny for this world..
    her lungs were 2 underdeveloped and the air was going “through” them into her chest…
    i had the chance to hold her in my hand when she made her last breath/heartbeat on February the 6th, at 5:30 am.

    Angelina is a fighter. she was born weighing 500 grams and 34 cm in lenght,her heart stopped twice in the first night but ses a warior, its like she decided that she wont give up this battle, that she will win it..

    i love her. i love them both..
    i feel as such a failure… damn i couldnt even carry my OWN children that damn 40 weeks so that theyd be big enough and prepared for this can i put my OWN children in such suffering?

    Jana Ina:


    I am so sorry about your little Jana Ina! I’m still praying for Angelina (and for you)!
    You’re not a failure, hun, you gave your babies a chance to live and breathe and even if it was only for a little while you still got to hold Jana Ina.
    I wish that I could give you a hug!


    awe im so srry to hear that.
    i hope every thing goes well angelina will make it.


    You have done nothing wrong, please do not blame yourself….you just hang on….it is hard to hang on when it seems like all is lost but as of yet all is not lost….no matter what you are a mommy and Angie needs you so much, just keep hoping and praying and know that no matter what happens it is not in vain and something good will come from this in one form or the other….be strong, I know you have it in you….Love Meg


    do not blame yourself…you gave them both all they need and needed…now you just need to be there for angie and be strong for her…dont give up stay strong…and remember the darkest hour is just before dawn…


    Hi Monika, big hugs! What happened was no one’s fault, especially not yours, so don’t ever blame yourself for it. You’re going to be a wonderful mother to Angie and your precious Jana will live on in your heaart and memory.
    Stay strong. E xoxox


    PLEASE dont blame yourself, it wasnt your fault 🙁 You and your babies will be in my prayers! I hope Angie pulls through!!!

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