- This topic has 13 replies, 10 voices, and was last updated by .
November 12, 2006 at 9:47 am #13027Anonymous
i just found out that im 5weeks pregnant and im really scared! im 18 and just moved country away from my parents and my boyfriends parents we are just starting out, we have no jobs and he’s in school and i about to start school so if (which i whole heartedly want to( keep my baby it will be exstremly hard with no support from family (not becuase they wouldnt want to help, but beacuse they live very far away now( and i not totaly sure how we could jugle the cost and cost of nursey fees etc.. theres so much to think about i would like some advise on other peoples experiences and if its even posiple for me and my bf to go to work and study in order for us to even give the baby a future. please help!November 12, 2006 at 12:26 pm #13030tyffanie_88
well sweetie…yes it will be hard…but there are all types of programs that young mothers could enter until they get on their feet. I’m totally against abortions so I’d tell you thats a NO NO but adoption is another option…but more than likely when you get older you would want to gain custody over your child again so that will be kind of hard for you to go thru it. I’m not a young mother but a lot of girls I kno who are say its worth it. When they look at their kids they couldnt imagine killing them or giving them away…so before you make any sudden decisions make sure you think about all the options as well as the consequences.
I wish you the best of luck
I hope everything turns out good.
TiffNovember 12, 2006 at 11:01 pm #13040kez_mummy_2_skye
I would really start by telling the parents as hard as it may be…They might offer you the support you will need too!November 14, 2006 at 4:17 am #13081kristen2006_il
It will be hard but there are programs like WIC through your local DHS(department of Human Services ) and LInk there is also alot of help for unwed mothers like help with your child care and things like that
keep in contact on how you are doing
KrisNovember 14, 2006 at 4:23 pm #13111Shana
I was 18 years old when I found out that I was pregnant. I was dating a guy for 2 years at the time. It was a text book abusive relationship that everyone swears will never happen to them. I wasn’t allowed to talk to or see any of my friends. I was limited to discussions with my family. I had broken apart from all that I knew but him. If I didn’t do what I told, I was punished. If I didn’t check in with him 4X a day as to where I was and what I was doing I was punished. This is how I lived my life. I was miserable and physically ill. Standing at 5’7 and barely 98lbs with bones protruding from my face and hips, I was anything but healthy. But he said he loved me and whether I believed him or not I stayed none the less.
I smoked 2 packs of cigarettes a day lighting one off the other, until one day they made me feel sick so I started to cut down. I sat down at a table one day and I drew a picture of a sleeping baby and it was then I knew that I was pregnant. I called a friend and they took me to the medi-center and it was there that my thoughts became a reality. I lived in a small apartment with my brother at the time and when I got home I called my boyfriend at work to tell him I was pregnant. Immediately he came over with 5 different at home pregnancy tests, and he stood and watched me take them in front of him (humiliating) All 5 came out positive. The next day he came over and I was home alone. He talked to me about having an abortion saying that my body was too sick to handle a pregnancy and if I had one he would stay with me. “ It’s me or that” I told him that he would have to leave. At that moment he had decided that if I wouldn’t have an abortion that he would give me one. I remember him holding me down by the throat on the bed ready to punch me in the stomach when I kicked him and ran. I ran and screamed for what seemed like an hour until finally he caught me and threw me into the door. It was then that my brother came home and took care of the situation and kicked him out.
I have never seen or heard from him since. I had a restraining order implemented and didn’t put his name on the birth certificate. I have never asked for child support because to be honest, you couldn’t pay me enough to deal with him.
My pregnancy was a nightmare with ultra sounds every 2 weeks. The Doctor’s suspected my daughter to be very malnourished, apparently her legs were not growing, she may have some physical deformations and she might be mentally slow. The recommendation was to terminate my “fetus”
I gave birth to a very intelligent, perfectly sculpted baby girl, who is tall and is nothing but legs. Am I ever glad I didn’t listen to technology.
My daughter has just turned 5 recently and believe me; being a Mom is my life. Sometimes I look back to the days when I first had her and laugh at the times I had to put her to bed in a snow suit because I couldn’t pay the heating bill. I used to buy KFC every Tuesday and stock up on their $2.00 special. When we started we had nothing but each other. No TV to watch, no car to drive in, no couch to sit on. Just us; cuddled in blankets and winter jackets to keep warm. I now hold a reputable job at a reputable company. Together we have replaced all that we have, and bought a new car. By the time I reach 25 I will own my own home. To all the girls out there who want to give up, DON’T. I stood strong on my own two feet and I have beaten the odds. My daughter was the greatest gift I ever could have received. Being pro life to me is not about saving a child’s life as much as it is about saving your own. She is my Angel and she saved my life. Where would I be now without my daughter? When you save a baby you save yourself, and open yourself up to great possibilities and rewards you never thought existed. The meaning of her names is “ Clear Morning Warrior” and at night my heart breaks when she prays:
Thank You for coming back from dieing,
Please one day will you send me a good Daddy?
If my daughter can walk through the fire so can you…have faith and God will be there with you all the way..you may not see him but he is walking next to you holding your hand every step you take and within every decision you make…by the way my daughter now has her very own Daddy and her prayers have been aswered as well. He’ll answer yours.November 16, 2006 at 2:46 pm #13178Anonymous
Well you can to the rigth place to ask for help. I was 18 when I got pregnant and just out of highschool. My boyfriend said he would be there for me and the baby and he wasnt. I decided to keep my baby and make things work. I knew it was going to be tough since I didnt have a job or anything but I did make things work out. I juggled school homework daycare and talking care of my daughter. I ended up gratuating and now I am married to a wonderful man and we have one daughter together and another on the way. To make a long story short there are ALOT of pregrams to help you throught the tough times and people are out there to help you inprove you education. I have faith if I can do it alone I now you can do it 2.November 19, 2006 at 3:03 pm #13232Anonymous
wow, Shana… your story is so inspiring. You built your way up from nothing on your own. Go girl!November 20, 2006 at 6:59 am #13266Anonymous
YOUR STORY HAS MADE ME REALiZED THAT PEOPLE REALLY DO TKE LiFE FOR GRANTAGE AND A CHiLD .. 0NE CHiLD CAN TURN A WHOLE LiFE OF MiSERY AND TEARS iNTO SUNSHiNE !! YOUR ARE TRULY AN INSPIRATION .. :cheer:November 20, 2006 at 9:46 am #13269angel_gal84
wow what a storyNovember 22, 2006 at 9:50 pm #13345barmy
Girl reading ure story sent shivers dwn ma spine it wos so insperational. Im currently pregnant am 7wks and its been a hard desion but youre story helped me emensley. The farther of my baby told me i had to get rid of it but i held strong because of you and thank god i did because he then showed his true colours an they wernt very pretty. Youre story has showen me that you need a man to make a baby but you dont need a man to rase a child. Keep doin what youre doing an be happy god bless xx:PJanuary 30, 2007 at 7:26 am #14829Greeneyes1234
I Realy like your story I was thinking at first I can not handle baby number 2 but your story made me cry .And now I Know that I can two make it that was truely touching and helpful .Turely an inspiration may god bless you I KEEPING MY BABY NOW .Thank you for your story I hope that this will help out others as it helped me .God Bless I keep you in my prays .My 2nd cHild due date is Sept 18 .THANKSJanuary 31, 2007 at 7:18 am #14853kbaby_2007
That story was sad!!! my mom was in an abuseive realationship too!:(January 31, 2007 at 7:24 am #14855guera
this story is so inspiring that it lifted my spirits.January 31, 2007 at 2:40 pm #14863Lauren5535
Although I am 21, I am experiencing a somewhat similar situation. My boyfriend is in his 3rd year of university and I am in my second. As of right now, I am 20 weeks along. Neither one of us has a job. However, we have the full emotional support of our parents. I just want you to know, that an education is sooooooo important. If either one of you gets some sort of diploma or degree it will enable you to implement yourself into the workforce. Further allowing you to provide a better life for your baby. There is so much support out there for the three of you. It’s going to be hard work at first, but with dedication and perseverance, you can do it…I promise you at some point everything will get better. Is there any chance that you two would be moving closer to your parents? Anyways I hope all is well and good luck with everything! If you ever need to talk, don’t hesitate to message me.
~ Lauren 🙂
- The forum ‘Pregnancy Questions and Symptoms’ is closed to new topics and replies.