- This topic has 6 replies, 6 voices, and was last updated by .
August 3, 2008 at 5:33 am #21791LostConfused
Okay, So I’m fifthteen and I’ve been with my boyfriend for two year’s and we are everything to eachother. One night he asked me if I wanted to have his baby and I answered yes. And then we started talking about it and we want to get me pregnant soon. See, he’s seventeen turning eightteen soon and he has a job and is moving out with his cousin who is eightteen and already has a child and raise her by herself. So, he’s going to support me and I’m going to have a place to stay if my mom does kick me out. I’am still going to finish high school. So I just wanted to know if anyone think I should or shouldn’t do and tell me why you think that. =|August 3, 2008 at 10:38 am #21792mrs.dandridge
Hi Alexis my name is Rochelle. Personally I think you should wait and have your baby. If you guys really love each other you can wait and have a baby. I had my daughter at 15 and even though Im doing much better now at 1st it was really hard. But anyway wait. Finish school first if you guys are together when you finish school then consider having a baby. Until then please finish school then weigh out your options on life. But trust me you can wait. I know you guys love each other but if your love is really true then things will work out for you guys in the future. GOOD LUCK!!!August 3, 2008 at 10:38 pm #21794Anonymous
Hello 🙂 I had my first child by choice at 15. What I didn’t realize is that it was COMPLETELY selfish. Not only am I no longer with the father, so my little girl couldn’t have a stable mom-dad household from the start, but I I couldn’t get a job and provide for my daughter properly until she was 2! I had to be financially dependent on everyone around me. Look at your reasoning: the only thing you are concerned about is having someone to support you! You need to learn how to take care of YOURSELF before you consider bringing another dependant being into the world. If you do, you will have to constantly rely on someone else to support you AND your child. How will that make you feel? And how will you be able to raise your kiddo and teach him/her to be INDEPENDANT when you can’t do it yourself? I mean, think about it – You could have a girl and the minute she turns 14 she might also decide to have a baby without considering the fact that her mother will have to support her and her child. And if you haven’t learned to take care of yourself by then, you will have to rely on the government or the people around you to take care of yourself, your daughter, and your daughter’s kid. It sounds harsh but it’s a vicious cycle. Good luck 🙂August 4, 2008 at 7:10 am #21796jessey223
Well although the having a baby and moving out on your own sounds good and all, you really need to think about the whole picture. Kids are great but if you think for a second that this is going to add to your relationship I would say your dead wrong. Kids are a challenge and to plan to take on potentially moving in with your boyfriend, continue going to school and having a baby is not advisable. If your boyfriend wants you to have his baby and you guys mean the world to one another why make your life more difficult then it needs to be before you get out of school. I know it sounds like forever but a couple of years will fly bye and if you guys were meant to be and are still together you will that much stronger. Your boyfriend will have established himself and gotten use to paying bills etc, you graduate and do whatever your heart desires. This is a decision you have to make but just make sure you consider all aspects of this. Kids are cute and all but remember there not laughing and cuddly all of the time and when they are yours there is no break at 15 is that something you are ready for? I wish you the best in whatever you decide to do.
JessicaAugust 7, 2008 at 8:31 pm #21847tragicxtryst
There’s so much time in the future to have kids… Moving out and getting pregnant before you’re even eighteen is something so much easier said than done. It really is something that can wait, you know?
If you love each other as much as you say, you have all the time in the world.
[/color][/size][/b]August 8, 2008 at 6:12 pm #21854winterishrain
moving out and in with your boyfriend is a huge step and a big test of your love for each other in the first place. Bringing a baby along would be even harder. Maybe you could try moving first to see how stable it is, and if it’s an environment you would want to raise a child in. Either way, I believe you should wait, but at least then you’d know. There are so many other things to do at 15 then raise a child. Once you have a baby, nothing is about you anymore, it’s all about your son or daughter.Your young and you deserve to experience the world without the overwhelming responsibility of a child. A new baby can come between it’s parents and take up most of their time together, and can strain any relationship if not done properly. Don’t get me wrong, babies are amazing and having one is like nothing else in this world, but think about how much better the whole experience could be if your stable, married, and finished with school so you can really enjoy your child without the added stress of finishing school and struggling to make ends meet (babies are expensive!)
Another thing, if your boyfreind is that close to being 18, your parents can press charges for statatory rape if they feel the need, becuase your still a minor. Imagine being pregnant with his baby while he’s in jail! I’m a soon to be single mom, due in three weeks, and I can tell you that going to every appointment alone and setting up and moving baby furniture alone and just being alone in general at a time in life that should be cheerful and celebratory is really tough and lonely. I’m sure delivering alone will be no fun either. I know your in love, but i know that ending up alone happens becuase it happened to me. Whatever you decide, just know that this decision, once you decide to have a child, isn’t one that can be undone. you can’t change your mind, or go back to your old life. Having a baby really does change everything! good luck!August 13, 2008 at 11:03 pm #21894jennlynn
hey alexis im jenn, and i think you should wait till your older to get pregnant, im about to be a mom in 3 months, my boyfriend left me after saying hed be there no matter what, and the babys father also left me and blocked me out of his life completely, i have a job and as much as you think its a cute thing, and itll keep him around, its never certin, i live at home with my dad, and i still have to redo a baby’s room, paint, put down floor, buy a crib and all that.. and even if he was gonna support you, hell never have enough to support you a baby and himself especially if hes moving out, i was gonna go to college and be a nurse and now i have to go back and finish my grade 12 and raise a baby, think about this a little more before you decide to have one, it might be better to wait till your 20’s and itll be a hell of alot easier if you wait and finish school and stuff. trust me. goodluck !
- The forum ‘Need Advice’ is closed to new topics and replies.