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October 20, 2010 at 8:30 am #27577Marieh071
I don’t really know how to start. This thing is so hard on me. I’m pregnant. Problem is, I’m single, a masters student in University with no job and no money but debt.
I’ve always wanted children and I have the biggest heart in the world, I would give my body and soul for the happiness of anyone around me.
I have alot of love to give and I looooove children. In fact, I already know what would be his or her name!
Reality is, I’ve talked about it to my mother, my sister and some close friends. Reaction? Abortion… According to them, I can’t afford to have a baby, I’m in University, I got no job, I’m still young and most of all I’m single. I mean, when you picture yourself with a baby you automatically picture yourself with the house and in a stable relationship with the father that you love more than everything. And who would want to get into a relationship with a single mother?
I’m not sure I could live with the «what if» thought all my life. I’m crying just about the thought of ending my baby’s life. I don’t want to. My heart doesn’t want to. But my head leads me to the obvious… It might not be the right time….
Please help me! I need your help. I’m sooo lost!
Thank you! 🙁October 22, 2010 at 8:29 pm #27583Elbie
Girl, I’m so sorry you’re having to go through all this… I know it must be very hard for you. But you can’t let other people determine your (and your baby’s) future. You have to make the decision that you feel is right for you. And if you can’t stand the thought of ending your baby’s life now… then I can only imagine how horribly you’ll feel after the fact. No one should have to carry that much guilt on their shoulders. There are other options… even if you feel that you don’t have the means to keep your baby, adoption could be considered. But also there is alot of help out there for young, single moms trying to make it with their little ones. And to answer your question about who would want to date a single mom? Actually I know several single moms and they still enjoy dating and hanging out with friends. Having a baby won’t completely end your social life.. it may just slow things down for a little while. I know it’s a very confusing scary time for you, but please listen to what your heart’s telling you. It may be hard, but love can work past sooo many obstacles. After all is said and done, you will be the one who has to look in the mirror and live with the decision you make. No one else will be as affected by this decision as you will. So, you do what YOU feel in your heart is right for you and your little one. I’m praying for you, that God will give you peace and guidance. I’m here to talk if you need someone. Good luck! and God bless. Love you!October 23, 2010 at 12:02 am #27584Knautica
Marieh – I understand you must be very scared, worried, and nervous right now. Is the father in your life? If so, have you told him about your pregnancy? I’m not here to judge you at all, but I am here for support. I don’t know what you believe in, but I do firmly believe that everything happens for a reason. Having a baby and being in school is going to be difficult, but not impossible. Also keep in mind, that you have 9 months to prepare for your little bundle of joy. I think you can get your life together in that amount of time, or at least on the right track. I’m here if you want to talk 🙂November 11, 2010 at 5:50 pm #27638LucyJuice
im also in your situation. Im in my 2nd year of university hundreds of miles away from family but me and the father are together.
for my the biggest problem i have is distance. id want to move back home either which way i go.
ive talked to my mam and dad and my best friend and they are supportive of either which way i go.
i am swinging at the moment towards abortion because like you i have no finacial means to support myself, no property and id essentially be homeless if i carried on. im also in alot of debt and not just because of uni
however i do have a problem of if it has a heartbeat yet. my god daughter was born at 23wks and before she was born there was going to be an abortion which didnt happen. 4 weeks later out she popped and is now 3 and healthy and full of life.
i think my main issue is if i abort and its already gone so far could i be losing a baby.
you sounds like you think of it as a baby and not a lil bunch of cells and i feel like once its past the lil cell stage it is a fetous then a baby soo.
my coucilor person and doc said i should go with my gut instinct because either way is going to have its challenges and problems im going to have to face.
i hope this has helped u think of your options. im still thinking about mine as u can probs tell ^^ i have a scan on monday and blood tests to see how far i am and if i am only a few weeks gone which ithink i am then abortion is seeming like the option for me. but make sure you make the right decision for you. your family and friends will support you no matter what they say in the heat of the m oment now x
i wish u well
lucyNovember 13, 2010 at 7:27 pm #27647Anonymous
Marieh071 and LucyJuice,
both of your stories are similar so i felt i should answer them together 🙂 . first of all, being in school and pregnant is a challenge, having no job, or money with debt also is very hard.But, the thing most girls forget about is the baby they have inside them 🙂 . that baby has a heartbeat,baby is listening to your every sound, thats how they bond with you and know you are mommy.Their little organs are rapidly getting better and blood starts to flow through them… there is never any reason to abort and LIVING baby.the stress you guys are under must be hard, but please before you make ANY decisions find a support group like SUG also, there is pregnancy resource centers in your area that can help you with appt. finacially , help supply diapers. there are churches around that are more than willing to help out.. please call the helpline and ask for the closest one in your area.1 866 942 6466.. there is also adoption . please check out this web site, and see how other people felt about it and also there are children on there that got adopted out by their mom and they are very grateful. loveschoice.org
please look into both the web site and the number.IF you need any help finding anything else in your area please email me and we can get you help and find ways for you girls to keep healthy and get things in order 🙂 ill be praying for both of you !!! please keep me informed..email me if you need anything 🙂
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