This topic contains 2 replies, has 3 voices, and was last updated by Brenda Simons .
- February 24, 2007 at 7:02 am #15339
if you’d have told me when i was younger i’d fall for a 36 year old i would have laughed right in your face,,, me never…or thats what i thought,,,,heres my story…..
Well, i’m Hannah, 17 in foster care will soon be moving into a supported housing commidation untill i’m 18 when i get my own flat, i’m not sure if i’m pregnant but i’ve been seeing someone i shouldn’t have. i’ve been seeing a 36 year old who has 3 children and s girlfriend, i never expected it to turn out like this and if you would have told be abit back i’d be dating a 36 year old at 17 i would have laughed straight in your face, but here i am and this is how it happened, well we’ve been talking ever since he started this job he’s in (wont say what job, wont give too many details), and a few weeks back i wasn’t getting on with my foster caer at all, i’d sit out in the cold every night till about 9, then one night he saw me he othered to take me home after he’d finished work, i agreed. well we sat talking for awhile and it took him an hour to get me in his car, i didn’t want to go home till latish so he took me the long way home, but i’d realised id lost my phone so we went back to find it (we found it), so he took me the quick way home, when he dropped me off i gave him a hug, and what happened next neither of us expected, we started kissing, then i saw him that thursday and friday aswell, but we didn’t sleep together till the week after, we didn’t use contraception, i know me seeing him his bad but at the time it doesn’t seem wrong, if i am pregnant i don’t know if he’ll stick around, dought it but i wont have an abortion i’ve already made that decision, well theres my story so far i will keep you updated!February 27, 2007 at 11:52 am #15414
I would seriously suggest that you keep your distance from now on. Please. Do it for yourself. At this point, it seems very apparent that you seem close to this guy. Since he has three kids and a girlfriend, let me tell you what may be going on in his life and his head:
SInce he has three kids, his main priority is them if he’s a person worth being called that. He has a girlfriend and though they may not be married, you don’t necessarily get a woman pregnant at least three times without having some feeling of concern for her. Free sex every night simply isn’t enough reason for not wanting to wear a rubber. He must have had at least some plans of staying with her for the long haul.
If he does get you pregnant, therefore, this may come out as a convenient excuse: since he had just met you and you almost immediately welcomed sex with him without his even being your boyfriend, it may boil down to his questioning whether you’re a loose female or not. Don’t let it get to a paternity suit. That hurts a lot emotionally and even if you do prove that someone is the father of your baby, you’d still have to go to court just to get some child support. Since he has three kids, the court will rule for more support for them most likely.
He’s 36. THose of you who are teens think that that’s old. I did. Now that I’m 37, I actually realize that, as some people explained it to me years ago, you actually feel that you’re in your prime and in great part that’s true. A guy is easily virile at that age, much more financially capable and able to sweep young girls off their feet. It’s easy really especially with girls who have not had a dearth of adult male role models around.
Please don’t be offended. Though your friend may seem to be a good guy, good guys can be weak and therefore capable of making huge mistakes that impact themselves and so many others. Honestly, it would’ve been okay with me if he were just 36 and you 17 and he didn’t have three kids and a girldfriend. That way, if he did get you pregnant, he’d be legally liable and actually able to be responsible for you. Being in his situation, however, that would be so much doubtful.
Look, elder men may seem to be great since they know things that your peers don’t, they’ve experienced a lot in their lives (he’s more than twice your age, after all), he has more money, etc. But that doesn’t mean he can’t be weak. He may be having problems now with his girlfriend and he needs a woman. Don’t let yourself be his emotional blanket. Be a friend but keep things simple. No sex, no messing around, no kissing.
Sex is complicated with a young man. An older man will have a completely different set of complications.
Please feel free to email me about this anytime. In a real way, been there, done that.
ErickMarch 6, 2007 at 9:12 am #15589
i agree with ericklirois……..u should stay away from him…..
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