i wont be able to ever for give myself.

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  • #23793
    Avatarsophia roses mummy

    Hi iim gabby and i am 16 years old, i had an abortiion when i was 15 years old when i was 6mnths and 3 weeks in and it was the worst day of my life i didt tell my mum or dad until i was 6 mnths & 1 week in, because they could tell something was wrong.and it was so hard to hide it they kept on saying are you sure your well enough to go to school because i kept on feeling really unwell and having mood swings.and i gues they didt think anything like that would of been the problem, its been 5months now since i had the abortion and if i could go back i would i would never of gone and i would have her in my arms now i look at the ultra sound scan of 6mnths a week before the abortion i had a scan and i look at it every day and it macks me cry. but i have a msg to girls who get pg being a teen be strong and do whats right at the time and tell your perants. at the time i couldt of coped with having a daughter but me and my boyfriend did stick to gether and weve been together for 19mnths now 🙂 so you must not be scard and do whats right by you. thanks gabby xo r.i.p sasha-lou ii miiss you everyday and i love you to bits! you would of made me the proudest person to walk into a room with you in my arms and no1 could ever take you off me, im so sorry for what i did to you and that you never got to live your life. r.i.p 10/4/08-9/9/08 happy birthday 11.1.09 iloveyou princess all my love mummy &+ daddy.:(

    #23826
    AvatarEvangeline

    Hi Gabby, I’m very sorry for your loss but I think it’s great that yr using this experience to try and stop other girls from going down the same road. It takes alot of courage to use your pain to help others because often talking about it is one of the hardest things you can do.
    I hope you’ll continue posting and sharing your experience.
    Hugs, Evangeline.

    #23844
    Avatarbernardette.x

    I was really touched by what you said. I am also 16. I had an abortion when i was 15weeks and 3days. I have never forgiven myself. I had mine 6 months ago and my baby would of been born on the 20th december 2008. My mum gave me no choice, but now me and my boyfriend are trying for another baby. This time i am giving my mum the choice of supporting me or walking out of my life.
    Keep strong sweetie, your not alone.
    xxx

    #23845
    Avatarsophia roses mummy

    thankyou &+ it is the worst thing anyone could go through. because my dad also said to me if i had my daughter she would have to of been put up for adoption 🙁 and it was still neither of the things i wanted to do, i wanted to have my little girl but i had no choice.
    r.i.p sasha-lou nicole clarke iloveyou & miiss yoou so much the day you died was the worst day of my life and i truley regret what i did to you, and im so sorry love mummy & daddy xxxxx

    #23850
    AvatarEvangeline

    >hugs< parents can be so cruel sometimes! my mom's always said that if I came home pregnant she'd perform the abortion herself- never told her we were expecting. I don't think your dad really meant that, I'm sure if things had worked out differently he'd be a proud and happy grandpa.

    #23928
    Avatarsophia roses mummy

    do you think? my boyfriend said to me last night that he wishes we never choice to have the abortion because he wanted us to have a litle girl together 🙁 and i really wanted to have her but its too late 🙁 and my mum said to me on the 11th jan that she wished id never went to the aptmnt 🙁 luv gabby xx

    #23931
    AvatarEvangeline

    I really do think so. Parents sometimes say things they don’t mean because, like us, they don’t always know how to react immediately to the unexpected… As unbelievable as it is, they’re human too 🙂 dads tend to be very protective of their daughters and I think what he said before is really just last minute toughness. Did it help in some way to hear your mum say that?
    Lots of hugs, E xoxo

    #23938
    Avatarsophia roses mummy

    thanks eva 🙂 and yes it did in a way but it allso made me regret more what i did and it made me feel really hurtfull inside too 🙁 but the therapist to day said you need to greeve over what you did and youll never for get her and what happend ever but you need to try and move forword with your life, so thats my aim to do 🙂 but its really hard lol… hugs gabby xoxoxo

    #24106
    Avatarsophia roses mummy

    r.i.p sasha-lou nicole clarke been gone 6months and 2 days 🙁 i miss you xxxxxxx
    love mummy xxxxxxxxxx

    #24117
    AvatarEvangeline

    I think alot of us don’t heal properly, because we don’t feel we have the reight to grieve after having an abortion… The truth is, you are a mother who has a lost a child and you have the right to, and should grieve your loss. Don’t ever let anyone convince you otherwise. You don’t have to forget about your baby in order to heal and move forward 🙂 remember her and love her, it’s your right as a mother.

    Hugs and best wishes, E xoxox

    #24439
    Avatarsophia roses mummy

    i feel so lost 🙁 this pregnacey news is AMAZING but heartbracking at the same time im happy as well as verry sad deep inside 🙁 i dont no what to do. 🙁

    #24442
    AvatarEvangeline

    Hi sweet pea,
    Firstly, I wanna congratulate you again on the pregnancy and then… hun, I know that yr concerned about people thinking you only want this baby to replace Sasha Lou, but both you and Ollie know the truth so please try and push that aside. Sasha knows it too sweety.
    This is going to be an amazing time for the two of you and you are allowed to be happy and excited. you are allowed to enjoy this pregnancy and love this baby, without fear of what other closed-minded, judgemental idiots have to say. People will ALWAYS find something to talk about when they are unhappy and unfulfilled, so pay them no attention.
    All that matters now is your love for each other and the little angel you’ve been blessed with.
    Have a happy and healthy pregnancy,
    Much love and support,
    Eva xoxox

    #24529
    Avatarsophia roses mummy

    i hope so 🙂

    i just wana move on with my life and really go for it with me and ollie and the new baby 🙂
    omg im so excited!

    xxxxx

    #24572
    AvatarEvangeline

    lol I’m sure everything is going to be great, especially since Ollie is so wonderful and supportive 🙂

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