i ShulDnt have to ChooSE

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  • #9986
    AvatarAnonymous

    I juss turned 19, on november 17 i found out that i was pregnant well, the boy that im pregnant by he already has one baby so its gonna be hard n thats very understandable but hes trying to force me to get an abortion n i really dont want one im happy about this baby… he always makes me cry daily now hes out here messing with other females having them call my phone and all that i dont want to have to deal with this so i decided that i was going to stay with my aunte for a while cus i cant deal with this rite now, plus another thing is i have not even told ne 1 about me being pregnant so im so unsure what to do… i dont want to get an abortion but im scared that he mite not really help me take care of it or he wont even care about it…. so what should i do about this situation? please help [img]

    #10184
    Avatarcemomto4

    [b] Well, I chose to continue my pregnancy and have my child as a single mother. I gave birth to my son just two months after I turned 18, with no support from my son’s father at all. Any man that would ask you to kill your own child is no man. Life for me is completely different than I ever pictured it to be. I never expected myself to be a teen mom. My family had a very hard time accepting the fact that I was going to have a baby and I was not going to get rid of my child by abortion or adoption. I decided while pregnant with him that I was NOT going to be any more of a statistic than I actually had to be. I started nursing school at the age of 18, and became a LPN at 19. I’m now 23yrs old, just gave birth to my fourth child, am happily married to a wonderful man I met when my son was only 5mnths old. I wouldnt have my life any other way. I am so glad I didnt listen to everyone around me that told me to abort. My wonderful 5yr old is such a joy, and I love him to death. While making this decision, and getting ready to go on a very rollercoaster adventure, please remember these two things: Nothing melts the heart of family like a grandchild, and I have yet to meet anyone that regreted having their baby and becoming a mother, but everyone I have ever met that had an abortion regrets it deeply to this day.

    Good luck.

    Christina

    #10185
    AvatarAnonymous

    My heart really goes out to you . I was in a similar position about a year ago when i found out I was pregnant. My sons father already had a 4 year old daughter he barley took care of , a wife he was sperated from and another girl pregnant with twins. He never pressured me into having an abortion but the thought was racing through my mind because I was 17 , my first year in college and had no clue how i could do it on my own without him. My sons father has seen him once when he was born and now I am doing it alone. I never thought I could but trust me PLEASE .. it is definately possible.i work , go to school and take care of my 4 moth old son. Only you can make that decision , so dont let his irresponsible self force you into doing something that you dont want to in your heart . You will never forgive yourself. This is your baby , whether he decides to be in his or her life or not, you are all that baby needs. I wont lie its very HARD , but its so rewarding and I thank God every day i followed my heart and had my son. Hope this helped at all. God Bless

    #10191
    AvatarAnonymous

    You are right to follow your heart. Don’t worry about your child’s father- there are other places and people that will offer you support even if he will not. You are obviously a brave person to stand up for your baby in spite of the harrassment you are getting! Hang in there! It is scary to feel like you are alone in this decision to have and raise a child, but there are plenty of support agencies and groups for single moms. Call around until you find what you need! There are many churches who would be willing to help, too….

    Peace to you and your baby!
    A

    #10250
    AvatarAnonymous

    I know how you feel im going throw the same thing …
    im 19 im 3 months and my boyfriend has a kid ..
    He dosent want me to have it …he since we found out he bring on my ass about not havin it..make me cry making feel bad ..thats it my fualt …
    Evey one in my family know that im pregnant they are all happy they all want me to have it ..
    im lost wut should i do…?I want have it…it’s in me not him im the one going tho all the pain all the hurt alone..
    i rather have the baby than be with him ..if thats wut i have to do …i will…!!
    the same time i still un sure …??? 🙁

    #10290
    AvatarLoveBBOA

    Coming from someone who has been in your shoes, follow your heart hun. I was a single mother up until 4 years ago. I was 16 when I had my son Damon and 18 months after he was born his father left and wanted nothing to do with us. Here 7 years later he hasnt seen or contacted us once. He has 2 other kids with another woman as well. I can’t say the road has been pleasent or easy. But I can say that it was worth it. 🙂 Just keep your head up and remember that you CAN overcome anything you put your mind to. There are so many of us that have!

    #10315
    AvatarKit

    Don’t let your boyfriend put you down or make you feel bad about the pregnancy. It takes two people to make a baby and he is as much responsible as you are. Unfortunately it sounds like he is not being responsible and definitely not being supportive of you. You deserve much better. With support from your family the pregnancy will be much easier. Listen to your heart and hang in there. Do not let you boyfriend pressure you into an abortion you do not want. Perhaps he will come around and be more supportive, but if not you are strong and can make it without him. Best wishes.

    Kate

    #10320
    AvatarQT08

    [b]You really shouldn’t have to choose. You should have your child regardless of whether or not he helps. If he is really neglectful then you take him to court for child support. He nneds to realize that you didn’t lay down by yourself and make this baby. It takes two to tango. Do what you think is best for you and your child.

    #10357
    AvatarLOHO3

    He is not a man. He is not even worth worrying about, honestly. I’m 16 and 34 weeks pregnant and my boyfriend didn’t want this baby to begin with but he is overjoyed that we’re having a baby now. And you know what, maybe it would be best for your baby if you didn’t stay with the dad. Be happy that he doesn’t want to be with you cos honestly, my boyfriend and I have quite a un healthy relationship and at times I really think that it would be better for the baby if we wernt together. But what happends happens and you have to live as your life progresses. My advice is though, ditch him, who cares about him. He’s hopeless and he has proven that himself. One day he’ll live to regret walking out on his baby. Don’t try and force the baby upon him though. That won’t do any good, it will just make him resent the situation even more. Let him come round to it. Who knows, he may even warm to the idea of being a father again as all the sweet memories of his first chikd come back to him.

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