i just cant do this!!!!

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  • #23044
    Avatarnadza

    many of u know me, im 16 married n have an 9month old… well guess what….

    im pregnant AGAIN! i found out 2weeks bak bcoz i started feelin queezy in the mornin but no mornin sickness, it was at this stage that it hit me that i hadent seen my period since the beginin of october! anyway thinkin up every other excuse for the feelin n rulin it out i went 2 buy a test but it was like i was preparin 4 a negativ, then that second red line appeared, i was… blown away, i told my husband who was playin with our daughter at the time…’im gonna kill u’ n handed him the test but it still hadent sunk into me, he was smililng n happy n tellin Aamina that she gonna be a big sister… as i organised her bathing things tears started pouring down my face… they were not tears of joy, i didnt want this! sure i luv bein a mum but i wasn ready 4 another one, i wanted 2 raise my baby girl properly with all my attention n i had plans 2 finish school next year, i wud have liked 2 hav anada baby wen she was about 2yrs… i was sooo upset n angry at everything! my husband in his wisdom jus kept quiet n observed me but i lashed out at him n he took it very lightly knowin that i wud b this way… till today i still hav resentment toward this pregnancy, does that make me a bad person? although i will never abort or hope 2 miscarry, im just not happy, i cant do this again so soon i dont want to, im not ready! i feel low low low, i thought i was comin 2 terms wit it but im jus foolin myself! i have yet to tell my parents but that ill do in time, im jus havin a real hard time knowin that im preg again even though im breastfeedin n on the pill… i need 2 talk to mums that have or have raised children close in age… how is hard is it? i need brutal honesty…i just know im gonna b a bad mum 2 this second baby! i hate myself for feelin this way!

    #23046
    AvatarMeg11

    You are not a bad person or a bad mommy for not being elated over this….it will be tough but you can look at things in a different light as well though…you can get your babies out of diapers sooner and there won’t be as much regression from your daughter when the baby is born because she will not be old enough to feel as jealous about the new arrival….just take things one day at a time and although you may not feel joy right now you will when that new little bundle is in your arms!! We are all here for you and although I did not have my kids as close together I know that you can survive and so will your daughter, you are a great mom and a second this soon doesn’t have to be the end of the world…just use your pregnancy time to prepare for the changes as much as you can…Love Meg

    #23048
    Avatarjessey223

    You can do this. And you of all people should know this. You had a baby at 15 or 16, you are doing it. Just keep your chin up and stay possitive. I have a friend that has two kids and they are 14 months apart and she says that it is hard but she is getting thru it. I think mweber has good points you will be in diapers at the same time etc. We are here to talk. Jessica

    #23051
    AvatarAnonymous

    Girl, it’s like me with this little man growing inside me. I resented my boyfriend, myself, and even our son. I wished for him to be gone… I was unhappy and wanted to wake up from the dream. Reality hasn’t ever sank in, to be honest with you, but still I’m so happy that I chose life for my little guy. Your daughter has brought so much joy into your life… imagine that again! It’ll be tough, yes, but it’ll also be rewarding. It can be done. You have the loving support of your husband and you’ll finish school soon enough. Your daughter will LOVE to have a new little playmate!

    Let me say this. Congratulations! Stay postive and everything will turn out okay.

    #23082
    Avatarbreathless

    Hey, my friend Chantal got pregnant when her daughter was two months old, Rylee and Ray’s birthdays are three days apart and she is loving every minute of it. She now has a toddler who is old enough to be independent and listen to what her mother says and a baby to do all the fun baby stuff with. You will be ok, just breathe and don’t worry about the scary stuff, just think about the happiness to follow. Don’t doubt yourself and let your husband be supportive. 🙂

    #23090
    AvatarLoren

    Hey Nadza, Its your fellow JHB girl here 😉

    If you’ve done it once you can definitely do it again! You’re stronger than you think! It may seem overwhelming but like mweber said – you have the whole pregnancy to prepare for this. And you know more or less what to expect this time round. There is no doubt that it will be difficult but you will cope! The plus point is that at least your children will be close in age (my brothers were 7 years older than me which really sucked!)

    If you need any help or just want some one to cry to I’m right in your town 🙂

    And remember – its all right to feel the way you are feeling! But give yourself credit, you are strong!

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