I had to make the hardest decison of my life

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  • #22398
    AvatarAnonymous

    Recently I found out I was pregnant I was 8 weeks and 3 days along the day I got my abortion.I was so scared and I wanted to back out of it but I panicked and went through with it . I know that everyone was pushing me to get an abortion and I knew in my heart I wanted to keep it so badly. My boyfriend who i’ve been going out with for almost 8 months now said he’d support me either way but I was so scared to ruin his life and the people around me . Now I’m completly devastated I’ve cried myself to sleep every night since it happend about 8 days ago. I had a medication abortion so its a pretty drawled out process im currently still feeling the pain from it and I just wish it would end. I feel like a horrible person and I feel bad for giving into what everyone else wanted instead of following what I wanted. I’m young and I still have high school left.I know I made a mistake and I know I’ll never be trusted again but I just wish that people knew that it wasnt easy for me and that it wasnt something I did on a drop of a hat . I thought for weeks about it and I feel terrible and now I’ll never get to see my baby and I’ll never know what he/she would of been like and i’ll never know if my life would of been okay or not with the baby around. I can’t really talk to anyone I have trouble talking to people except my boyfriend and he’s been really supportive he’s been there when I needed to talk and cry and it’s deffinatly not been easy . Especially since I feel like I failed my baby and myself for giving into what others wanted and thought.:( 🙁 🙁 🙁 🙁

    #22509
    Avatarjenni

    i know how u feel but firstly be grateful u had ur boyfriend around when i had to make the decision my ex was knowhere to be seen. when i first found out he promised me all these things that he would provide for me and the baby but as soon as our parents found out he had no back bone and backed out of everything he promised me!! i know exactly how you feel about feeling guilty and like you have betrayed your baby…it does get i promise it takes time but concentrate on your future and completing school thats what i had to do i was taking my exams when i found out i was pregnant and it had its consequences but im a college now and i think sometimes i wouldnt have that if i had had my baby you sometimes have to convince yourself of the way things could have been bad. but one day you will meet your baby in heaven and then you have all the time in the world to have with him/her. hope thats all i can say hope for the future =]

    #22518
    Avatarjessey223

    You are not a horrible person….I know this doesn’t seem possible right now but the pain will fade with time. Don’t expect for it to be next week or next month but it will eventually and this will help you grow into the person you will someday be. I had an abortion at 16 and it was awful, I too cried myself to sleep and thought about that baby all of the time. It’s been 8 years (god that makes me feel old) and I still think of the day the baby was supposed to be born but it did make me who I am today. And I don’t wonder anymore if I would have been able to do it because I now know that I could have but I would not have my daughter that I had at 18 if I had that baby. So sometimes life takes turns and they are hard but it will all work out. I really hope you believe me when I tell you that you are not a horrible person. I am here anytime to talk. Jessica

    #22697
    Avatarpinkchik6

    sweetie im not going to lie to you it wont get better but it will be okay.

    I too had an abortion based on other peoples opinions my baby would’ve been two months old. and i too hate myself. all i can say is NEVER EVER listen to other people again. you listen to your heart and your heart only

    i feel my baby around me. it helps me to talk to her. i like to think it does anyway. you should try it.

    i believe my baby has forgiven me, but when i have my break downs i still get worried that my baby hates her mum for what i did.

    talk to me anytime sweet x x

    #22719
    AvatarGangY

    hunny…
    please you have to know that you are not alone. there are people that want and hopefully also can help you.
    it helps to speak about it.
    it does.

    i was there, i know totally what you are feelin…maby not 100% but atleast 90% of that..

    if you wanna talk, or anythin… i would be glad to be there for you..

    you can post or eami8l me anmytime you want

    love,
    monika**

    #22762
    Avatari.FiGHt.fOR.lOVE.

    if you need anything, let me know.
    im sorry all this had to happen.. 🙁

    #22780
    AvatarAnonymous

    I’m really sorry that you went through that, but you do need to forgive yourself. You may not be able to move on, but you do need to try.

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