I chose Abortion. I was 16 and selfish

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  • #26710
    Avatar1stupidmistake


    I was 16 when i found out i was pregnant, I was 8 weeks gone. I had always bin a very quiet girl as i got bullied alot from school, so it came as a very big shock to my mum, dad and my brother. When i told my mum i was pregnant she flipped out put holes in the door smashed my grandads phone smashed a mirror. My dad hes always bin very protective of me and same as my brother has too. I was still with the father of my baby at first when i told him he was unsure, then he said he wanted and then he said he didnt. in the end he said it was him or the baby, & me being stupid gave into him. When the day came he said he didnt want to take the day of & didnt come, so my mum came with me. Ever since that day i cant forgive my self and dont expect anyone else too. Im 18 years old now i had my abortion on 1/05/08. I cant describe how much i hate my self. i cry my self too sleep most nights, I get the outfit out that i bought for my baby to come home in & just look at it for hours crying. Il find the band out that i had on my wrist & just sit and hold it, i cant watch a tv programme that has anything to do with babbies, birth or pregnancy, i get upset when i see a pregnant woman or a new born. Is this normal or is it just me? Doctors put me on councelling i went for 1 hour and decided i didnt deserve that help. This is 2 years on and the pain is getting worse the mental torture is getting worse, i try and talk about it too my boyfriend and he just says ive got to get over it its in the past now. None of my family or friends know im like this they just think im over it. I jsut dont know what to do anymmore.

    #26734
    AvatarEvangeline

    Hi sweetheart, I am so sorry that you’re going through all of this on your own. I’ve been there too and I know what it’s like. The easiest thing for you to is to share what you are feeling with someone close to you… It sounds to me like you are suffering from Post Abortion Stress Syndrome (PASS). It’s a very real thing, quite similar to PSTD. You’re boyfriend needs to be more supportive and understanding about what you’re experiencing right now.
    Have you considered speaking to a therapist, you can decide if that works for you or not, but it’s worth a try and perhaps getting all these pent up emotions off your chest could be very helpfull.
    There are also other ways to cope with grief, personally, I enjoy writing poetry and keeping a diary about my thoughts and feelings. I light a candle for my babies when I miss them and also on the annimisery of the day that I lost them. THere are many other things that can help you cope. You just need to look around and find something that works for you.

    Please let us know how you are doing and if things just get too heavy, click on my page if you need to vent, I’m always willing to help where I can.

    Love and hugs
    Eva

    #26767
    Avatariswaggaliciious

    Hey hun, I’m not going to preach because you obviously did learn from this and right now you do need comfort more than a lecture. You made a mistake now you need to move on from it and I never said its easy and I never said it will be quick. The pain will slowely decrease. Maybe you could stop other young mothers by telling them your experience and how you feel about it. Try counseling and support groups. Maybe you can change another girls life and stop her from making the same mistake. People usually listen to somebody who been through the experience. Heal quick and Good Luck in the future.

    #26907
    Avatarhippielove

    hi i was 17 when i had my abortion. i just had it on febuary 12th. i feel that im dealing with it well, i stopped cutting, but i still havent been leaving my bed. i dont want to see anyone or hear anyone. i really hope that you can overcome the everyday pain, if you ever do i would love your help. even if you cant you should add me, id love to talk to you. maybe we can help eachother down the line.

    #27029
    Avatarmianinjakitty

    You have PASS ( post abortion stress syndrome) get consuling

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