How to tell someone?!

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  • #27735
    Avatarjade21

    I had a medical abortion at the age of 15 when I was 5 weeks pregnant.
    I am now 19 and it is the biggest regret of my life. I don’t believe in what abortion stands for, but when I was in the situation of a crisis pregnancy at such a young age I put my morals aside and took part in this.
    I am an absolute mess inside, still, almost 4 years later & I just want to feel normal again.
    The only other person that knows about my abortion is the father of the baby who I am no longer in contact with.. I hid it from my parents/family & friends and to this day none of them know.

    I really NEED to tell somebody, a friend who I am very close with – but I just don’t know how to bring it up as I think it will be very unexpected!
    Can anybody help?

    Thankyou for the love and support found on this website x

    #27746
    Avatarmylene490

    🙂 hi…you can count on me…tell your feelings with me..i know it’s your conscience that tells you to confide your feelings..

    #27747
    Avatareloise_roxygirl

    Hello Jade21

    I had an abortion when I was 17, however my experience was very different. I told my friends and family. Everyone was dissapointed that I had gotten myself in the situation however everyone wanted to help me. I first told my (now ex) boyfriend that I was pregnant, he told me to get rid of the pregnancy straight away. All my friends dissagreed but all told me that would support me in my choice. My choice was to abort the baby because I felt it was best for her (it was a little girl). I was sad and lonely especially after the break up, I ended up telling my mum and dad together. They were both upset that I couldn’t go to them for help. I’m not too sure why I didn’t I guess I felt ashamed and that they would think of me differently.

    In the end it was the right thing for me to tell someone and so should you. You SHOULD NOT have to carry the burden by yourself. Tell a close friend and even if it’s unexpected, I was crying when I told my bestfriend and we were getting ready for our formal. I really hope you are okay because I know sometimes I’m not

    #27748
    AvatarEvangeline

    Hi Hun and welcome to SUG. I’m so sorry that you’ve had to go through all of this on your own.
    i think that speaking to a counselor might be the first step into the right direction. having someone cunsel you through the grief of losing a child, as well as help prepare you for telling your folks could be really benificial.

    Also, parents usually just want what’s best for you and that’s why they’re a little harsh on us sometimes. Sometimes planning what you want to say and how you think they’d respond can be helpful. or, if you tell another adult, maybe even your pastor and have them go with you when you tell your folks.

    I really hope that find the strength to speak to them and that you find healing.

    Love
    Eva

    #27781
    AvatarMolly92

    Hi. I just wanted to let you know that I know exactly what you’re going through. I was lucky to have my sister there with me when I got the abortion, but she doesn’t really know what I am going through. I have no one to talk to about this, someone who knows and understands what I am saying. Sometimes I long for someone so much that it hurts. I tried talking to a counsellor at the clinic where I got my abortion, but I knew that she would never understand what I was saying or going through. I just wanted to let you know that I am here for you. And if you think it’s a good idea, I would love to talk with you about this. 🙂

    Molly

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