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May 15, 2007 at 10:01 am #17321ohmyalayah2005
008000“>Okay I get pregnant at 13 and we’re abstaining until marriage[which is Dec. 9th]!! But how can I be sure I want to marry my baby’s daddy?? How can I be totally positive he is the one?? He says he loves me and Alayah but am I supposed to believe him?? I guess I do..or is it just a thought of us being the perfect family?? We get our pics made monthly and they are of a sweet couple and there baby!! Is that what I want?? The image or the real thing?? I have been so confused since he proposed!! Is all he wants is the perfect family or does he really love me?? He may act like it but is it certain?? Our families disagree on this marriage but they disagreed on Alayah and she turned out beautifully!! Should I get married to this picture or wait a little longer to find out the truth on Luke and I??May 16, 2007 at 2:37 am #17327mommy6
i was in the same boat as you 8 yrs ago i was with my hubby for 5 yrs before we got married and 2 kids and one on the way n i wasnt sure marriage is a big step its different for everyone do you really love him thats the big question cause i believe if hes still with you and the baby -child he cares how much youll never really know but i think if hes man enough to do his job of being a dad and wants to be a husband thats really cool, your young but you need to do whats rite for your self what makes you feel good n happy n i believe you will marry him n it will work out i cant say forever but it will be ok. but good luck anyways.May 16, 2007 at 3:06 am #17330goodluckyall
All you can do is to go with what your heart (soul, conscious, God, whatever you’re feeling it is) tells you to do. Do use your head and logical thinking, but mostly go with what feels right. One bit of advice is that waiting can never hurt anything. There is no set time limit in which you must marry, so it’s better to wait further if you’re feeling like something is lacking or off. Also, you shouldn’t "settle," but you should also know that (I believe) there is no ride-off-into-the-sunset kind of romantic fairytale despite what you’ve seen in movies. Marriage is hard work and compromise if it’s to work in the long run. Good luck to you. One more thing, if you’re under around 25, I say wait on marriage anyway since you don’t even know who you are yet at this age. Experience life a little. There’s no hurry. 🙂May 16, 2007 at 4:36 am #17331navywife
I went throught he same thing before i married my husband.mos people do. marriage is a big step, and alot of people are scared of that step. just try ad keep in mind that your wedding isnt for months. that way you can still have time to think it through. best of luck.May 16, 2007 at 5:46 am #17336Meg11
Hey there…as I have already told you…..you have every ounce of my respect for abstaining untill marriage….I think the fact that you are making sure he loves you before you say I do is a very important thing to think about….what I want to ask you is…do you love him???? Marriage was meant to be for 1 man and 1 woman untill death….if you dont know if you love him enough to commit to that then it is best to wait…..my guess is that he does love you with a very true and deep love….you had sex one time had a baby and he is respecting you by marriying you and waiting untill that day to have sex again….if he didnt love you then he would have bailed out when you told him NO SEX or when you got pregnant…..are you two receiveing premarital counseling???? If he is wanting to marry you for the wrong reasons then counseling will bring that out…..I know that it is best for children to have both of their biological parents married and living under the same roof..but….it is worse to go through a painful divorce down the road then it is to not get married…..if you are ready and willing to committ and so is he and both of you want this marriage for the fact that you love each other and want to spend the rest of your lives together then get married…..if you have uncertanties then please wait…..talk with him and ask him questions if he loves you he will understand where you are coming from and he will give you the reassurance you need…I will be praying for you…..MegMay 16, 2007 at 9:43 am #17344bweber
well u have until DEC to decide what YOUR feelings are…i don’t think it’s his feelings that u r worried about (from what i pick up from reading what u wrote) i believe it’s ur feelings that u rn’t sure about not his…can i ask how old u r?May 17, 2007 at 8:43 am #17382ohmyalayah2005
I am 15!! And thanks for your reply!!
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