Can’t decided

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  • #24948
    Avatartaylor342

    Since I can remember I have said that kids are not for me, and I stuck with that untill I found out I was pregnant I was sure my life was ruined. I had finally reached the horrible decision to abort my baby. It has been 4months and 7days since I did what I did. And now after the fact my boyfriend and I relieze how much we really want a child. The baby that is now gone was due June 26th, 2009. I still feel guilty about what I did. We have decided that come September we will try again hopping that the new baby will be born on June 26th 2010, but for some reason Im not sure if its the right thing to do. I know Im still young(19) and he would be going on 22. The emptyness we both have about are first baby needs to be filled, but Im worried that this is not the right way to do it.

    #24974
    AvatarHappilyEverAfter

    You are still young. If you are unsure that this is the right choice, I would hold off a couple years. Don’t have a child just because you feel guilty about the aborted baby. 🙂 Do it because you truly are ready.

    #24992
    AvatarAnonymous

    Hunny, this is a normal way to feel after losing your baby to abortion. But having a baby just because you want to ‘make up’ for the one that died is not a good idea. In fact, it won’t make up for it. No baby will ever fill that place in your heart.
    If you and your boyfriend really want to have kids together, why don’t you get married first so that you really can have a life-time commitment to each other? No matter how young you are, getting married before you have kids is the right thing to do. Kids put a big strain on a relationship, sometimes the marriage vows are what give you that extra reminder that you’ve pledged your life to this person and can keep you from splitting when things get really hard.

    Listen deary, no baby can ever fill the emptiness in your heart. Only Jesus can do that when you pray that He will be enough for you. Even though you will always miss your baby and regret your decision, you don’t have to be a slave to your regret and guilt. Jesus can set you free from that.

    You can always come on here when you want to talk about how you are feeling or how things are going. *Hugs*

    #25003
    Avatartracy17

    Replacing one baby with another, will not help your heartache. You are always going to wonder what your first child would have looked and acted like throughout years to come despite how many children you have.

    My advice would be to seek some counseling before you try for another baby. You should spend some time talking with your boyfriend about whats happened and what you want for the future and be sure that another baby is what you both want because it is still a huge responsibility.

    I hope everything goes well for you 🙂 x

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