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Please, I really need advice

  • MissKirsty
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8 years 9 months ago #1 by MissKirsty
MissKirsty replied the topic: Re:Please, I really need advice
What was the test result?

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8 years 9 months ago #2 by emerald_aradia
emerald_aradia replied the topic: Re:Please, I really need advice
In a month I'll be 18 and he'll be 19. I know we're young but it doesn't seem like we're as young as we actually are. I'm a junior in university, I have my own apartment, and I manage working and being a student. Not to mention I handle my own affairs in both countries in which I live. I don't do anything most of the people my age do (drinking, clubbing, etc).
It's without a doubt that our children will have both parents. While he's my high school sweetheart, he was also my best friend long before we started to date, and I've known him my whole life. We're getting married in June, and he would never walk out on our child.
But while he would be responsible and loving to any child we had now, he wouldn't be open to intentionally starting our family. We've always agreed that we would at least have our Master degrees. I see the logic and I would never ask him to be a teen parent willingly, but I can't imagine these next three years. So, against all rationale, I'm still hoping.
I'm taking the test tomorrow, and I don't know what answer I'm hoping for.

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8 years 9 months ago #3 by emeraldforest//myheartbro
emeraldforest//myheartbro replied the topic: Re:Please, I really need advice
Im so sorry about your miscarriage. it seems we have more in common then just our usernames. I lost my little baby a few weeks ago due to m/c... i was almost 5 weeks.. im so sorry for your loss and i know the pain your feel. Im 16 btw,

are u married? if u have been ttc for more then 1yr and your under 35 u should go see a fertility doctor... or have you ever thought about adoption? there are millions of kids out there with no mom or dad or a loving home. You could provide that to them.. from 2 weeks to 12yrs old there are tons of children out there waiting for a good home. =]

if u are still in your teens like me, then please try waiting.. all my life ive wanted a baby so bad, but i know that i cannot provide my baby with all that it needs and so i have vowed to wait and enjoy my teen years as best i can.

Please talk to someone you trust about this if it ever gets to be too much. I am always here as well.
God Bless,
Enya

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8 years 9 months ago #4 by Meg11
Meg11 replied the topic: Re:Please, I really need advice
First off welcome to the site...My name is Meg...the things you are experiencing could be pregnancy symptoms so it is worth taking that second test and also getting a blood test if needed...like you mentioned the wanting of a baby can cause you to have "phantom" pregnancies where you have all the symptoms and no baby...I am sorry to hear of your miscarriage that must have been a very painful experience, are you and your partner married? If so have you thought of going to a fertility doctor to find out if you are having issues in that area? Have you talked with him about your need for a baby in your arms? If you are not married then maybe you should take that step first? No matter what you need to be on the same page with each other because a baby should have two parents, I say should rather than needs because I myself was a single mom and my kids suffered a lot because of it but they have managed quite well since I have been married....anyways take that second test and so it with your first mornings urine, that is when they are most accurate...there can be what is called implantation bleeding but it is not like a normal period, just a light spotting for minimal time...I really hope this helps a bit and if you need to know more just ask...like I said waiting till marriage to get pregnant is always best for everyone involved, especially baby, but if you end up pregnant then count the little bundle a blessing....Love Meg

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8 years 9 months ago #5 by emerald_aradia
emerald_aradia created the topic: Please, I really need advice
Well I read a thread on another site about getting negative tests and still getting your period (or what seems likes a period) but still being pregnant. I'm shaking and about to cry, I'm so afraid to hope that maybe, just maybe, I'm pregnant. I miscarriaged several months ago. Neither this time nor the last was planned. We used condoms, everything. My dreams are so vivid, and they come almost every night. Me giving birth, me pregnant, us with our child. I've been tired and sick, constipated and gassy. Running to the loo every five minutes. I'm leaking and my breasts are tender and I swear they're getting bigger. Mood swings, back pains. I get a lot of headaches, which I very rarely got in the past. While things don't smell terrible terrible, it's sharper and unpleasant. None of my pants fit anymore. I'm dizzy sporadically. And my stomach feels tighter. I had to quit smoking because I couldn't take the taste/smell. I'm always sweating and I'm thirsty more often than I used to be. And I've gotten acne, which I've never really had in my life. Heck, even my palms tingle and itch (which I read on another site could be a sign). And I just feel like I'm pregnant.
But here's the thing. I feel like I could be making it all up because I want to have a baby so badly. It's the only thing I think about lately. It's ten times worse than after I miscarriaged, this desire to have a child. And I only took one test, which said negative. And I've gotten my period, even though it was late, it seemed a lot lighter than usual, and lasted three days. But after reading that one thread, I feel myself hoping, And I'm so worried about doing so because I don't want to be disappointed. When I got my period, all I could do was cry. My biological clock and maternal instincts have gone wild. I'm afraid to take another test and I don't want to hope.
What does everyone else think? Advice, comments, similar stories? Also - I don't know why I want to have a baby. I never did in the past, at least not until I was older. But in these last two months or so, I can't think about anything else. I think about it, and dream about it, all the time. I know it's irrational and my partner and I aren't trying, nor do I have any intentions to stop using condoms (though I did stop the birth control, just in case). I can't explain it, it's not to be trendy or to repair a broken relationship or anything.

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