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Sober mothers and drunk daddies

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10 years 5 months ago #1 by baby_dee
baby_dee replied the topic: Re:Sober mothers and drunk daddies
hey huny am dee am sorry u have to go trough with him please dont take this the wrong way i know we all dream on havin a family an being happy but u know u can have that but not with him he is not good for u or u babies think about it u already have a baby who got taken away from u bcos of him i think u are a strong person an u will do fine without him u have ur family is support an thats all u need not someone who cheats on u an gets drunk after promisin that he wont.
be strong an make a better life for u and ur babies
i know u can do it
keep the faith
am here if u wanna talk
take kare God bless u
love dee

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10 years 7 months ago #2 by bambimami32
bambimami32 replied the topic: Re:Sober mothers and drunk daddies
i dont know what to say,sweety you dont deserve this and your kids dont needs this aswell...why have you stayed with this man that treats you so badly for so long...how many times has he said we has changed and lets you down.besides his drinking he clearly does not love you because he is sleeping around with other women and with every women he sleeps with he is also sleeping with the people she has been with...you dont know what kind of std's they are carrying
and he will eventually infect you with HIV think about your kids think about YOU. HE IS NOT WORTH YOUR TIME,CARE AND LOVE.

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10 years 7 months ago #3 by JCarpenter1026
JCarpenter1026 replied the topic: Re:Sober mothers and drunk daddies
You know, I went through the same situation but mine ended in the death of him because he was that bad with drinking, partying, and driving. He didn't care, he didn't want us, he showed love only in bed, and when he wanted something he acted nice, got it, then drank and became a ass. Honestly if he is really that bad give him an altamadium and tell him it's the bottle or me. Reguardless of the kids cause I am sure you are all they need, but he is apart since he is the daddy and he needs to grow up and act like a man. End it if not because I do not want you to go through what I went through. It almost led me to suicide. Good luck girl!

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10 years 7 months ago #4 by JCarpenter1026
JCarpenter1026 replied the topic: Re:Sober mothers and drunk daddies
You know, I went through the same situation but mine ended in the death of him because he was that bad with drinking, partying, and driving. He didn't care, he didn't want us, he showed love only in bed, and when he wanted something he acted nice, got it, then drank and became a ass. Honestly if he is really that bad give him an altamadium and tell him it's the bottle or me. Reguardless of the kids cause I am sure you are all they need, but he is apart since he is the daddy and he needs to grow up and act like a man. End it if not because I do not want you to go through what I went through. It almost led me to suicide. Good luck girl!

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10 years 7 months ago #5 by gbrown68
gbrown68 replied the topic: Re:Sober mothers and drunk daddies
I am 38 years old and have a good feeling I know what you've been going through and what you will continue to go through. Is this man worth the pain he will cause you and your children? He needs some serious treatment and until you let go and let him fall, he will never hit rock bottom like he needs to. You are there to let him walk all over you and continue to take him back. You are enabling his behavior and therefore, he knows he can always count on you to take him back no matter what.
So, what you need to do is get ready to start taking care of you and your children. Your children are most important here and you need to take care of them and keep them safe. You have made some choices that have affected your future so far, please don't make another bad choice by staying with him. What you can do is not get married to him and let him know you'll be more than happy to support him while he goes through a treatment program, but he needs to get himself better and start moving down the right road.
My ex husband has been in treatment about 7 times. Out of the 7, probably 3 -4 while I was still with him. Yes, I was pregnant too. What a miserable time. I was pregnant for the 1st time and he went into treatment. I couldn't enjoy my 2nd pregnancy at all. I'll never forget my mom saying at Christmas time when I broke the news to her that I was 3 months pregnant.............why'd you go and do that? It still makes me feel bad. I know what she meant, but when you pregnant your hormones make you extra emotional. That's been over 12 years, but it's like it was said yesterday. Anyway, I finally made up my mind to just be done with things. I was worth more than the way he treated me, all the nights up after coming home at 2:30 and all the yelling and verbal abuse. I didn't need to raise my kids in that kind of enviroment. Wow! It was a hard road, but I made it. You can too. You don't need to be treated that way either. I had many of nights where I picked him up from his drinking bouts, picked him up at the hospital with my boys, called the jail to see if he'd been arrested, and called the morgues. Not a fun thing. And you know what? Your life would be so much easier not having to deal with this anymore. I couldn't believe the relief it gave to me and the kids when I said I was done. I know it's a hard thing to do, but you have the strength to do it. It's now been 9 years and I've never been happier. In the beginning he would harrass me, climbed on the top of my house several times trying to get into the house, came to my back door in the middle of the night and I took many of calls. It gets better. It really does. It just takes time. In the meantime, you will get stronger and feel better about yourself and the kind of world you are bringing your new child(ren) up in. My ex took several years more to finally come to a point where he was ready for the treatment and has now been sober for 2 1/2 years. And, guess what? Sober or not, I am happier without him. We get along very well and my kids are happier now that dad is sober. That's the only thing you can wish for, but you can't do it. He has to do it himself. If you have to raise this baby(s) on your own, you'll just have to find the courage to do so. That brings me to now. Again, I am 38, pregnant for the last time and so very happy. I will be getting married some time this year, but we're not in any rush to do so. We are just taking this all as it comes. He is a wonderful man and has been for 5 years. My kids love him and you too can find the same thing. But, you first have to take care of you before this can all happen. Life is a rough road and things happen for a reason. You are just made stronger by everything that has come your way. If you ever want to talk, feel free to email me. I'd be mroe than happy to talk with you and support you with the choices you need to make. Good Luck and God Bless you and your family!
Gabrielle

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10 years 9 months ago #6 by Angela
Angela replied the topic: Re:Sober mothers and drunk daddies
hey darling,
im only 17 but i know that no matter what any guy promises me you can never beleive, im not sayin all guys are bad because there are good ones but this guy u mention in ur article continues to do the same thing over and over to u so what makes you think that this time his \"promise\" will be any different from the last 50 promises he happened to break. Your stronger then you think you are. You have beautiful children and are more then capable of raising them by yourself, its not like he has ever rasied them with you. He has been doing this to you for a long time now and continues to promise things he clearly isnt keeping, you deserve much better then to be cheated to and lied to. There will come a day when a guy who respects and loves you an your children more then you thought so dont settle for empty promises.
keep safe

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