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Don't know what to do

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10 years 5 months ago #1 by Meg11
Meg11 replied the topic: Re:Don't know what to do
this is for both of the girls under me.....I was in a relationship for over a year with a guy who was abusing me...I had to have sex at the drop of a dime, I had to make a perfect cup of coffee and fix breakfast and have his work clothes warm and waiting for him all by the time he was done with his shower every morning....he didn't have a drivers license so i then had to drive him to work...it took 1 hr round trip...by the time I would get home I would have a message from him telling me he didn't have work that day (because he slept in so long) and I would have to go back and pick him up (another hour trip)..I would then drive him back down the road another hour round trip and drop him off with his friends who would make sexual comments at me so he could drink until who knows when...I was not allowed to talk on the phone because if he called and it was busy I was in trouble...I would usually get his call around 2:30-4:30 and I would then have to yank \"our\" daughter out of bed and make the half hour trip to go get him and have him yell at me calling me a \"slut\" and a \"worthless f***\" and other wonderful things right in front of \"our\" 1 year old daughter for another half hour...then it would be back in bed to be his \"sexual pleasure\" and we would wake up and do it all over again...I lived that way for way too long...oh it didn't start that way but every time I let something slide \"he must be having a hard day it's ok for him to be so demanding\" \"well he can call me that because I know what I have done in my past..I deserve it\" \"I am the mother of his baby and he pays the bills I should do EVERYTHING around the house and have sex when he wants to\" he would get worse...I was not allowed to work but he hardly did and we were always out of diapers and laundry soap....he would scream at me and accuse me of flirting when I would check my rear view mirror to make a lane change...I could go on all day...my point is this...if you are not legally married then you don't have to and shouldn't have sex with these guys..they don't own your body...in marriage a husband has no right to \"demand\" sex...a wife shouldn't with hold it for no good reason but it is not something to be demanded...if you have appointments or want to go to lunch with a friend you have every right to go and take the bus if you need to...Don't let these guys boss you around...especially if you are pregnant with their babies they should be protecting you (in a healthy way not by controlling) and helping you to get by...not demanding food sex and obedience....I don't know if you want to hear this but you are both being abused...I never saw the abuse that was going on until I left the situation...thank God that my daughter does not recall those nights of screaming and abuse...but had I stayed with him just because I wanted her to have a dad I guarantee that she would think that it was normal to be treated that way and she would probably end up in a relation similar to that one...protect your selves and your babies....if he loves you he will change and turn around and ask for you back and be a good dad but it will take time...I care for you girls and it breaks my heart that these guys are being so rotten to you...you are precious and of much value...you deserve better....Love and Prayer Meg

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10 years 5 months ago #2 by euro_girl_frm_aus
euro_girl_frm_aus replied the topic: Re:Don't know what to do
hi,i was kinda in the same situation but i wasnt pregnant..my bf used to go to work go wit his friends cum to me make me cook for him,get his sex then go to sleep,wake up and go!!!i got so sick of it and told him its over..he then realised he felt like nothing without me n we got bak together,things were good at teh start then it started again.he started lying about where he was n who he was with,it was never with girls but thats not the point,you dont lie to your partner.i wasnt alowed to have friends wasnt to look at another male,answer my fone wen ppl rang me or walk anywhere or take any transport.the way i see it is wen ur in a reationship your partner or partner and children come first.i hate his mates with a passion they are such a bad influence.in the end i sed if he wants me say good byr to your friends.he did!!! he still talks to the normal ones but he dont go there wifout me n we do everything together.things are so much better now..tell him you and your baby are to come first,does he wanna be the daddy or does he want somebody else to tak eon that roll.that is very immature for him to be doing this(this is wat my bf was...immature) your not fat your pregnant n he has no rite making u feel like this,tell him to grow up or get out of your life n stay out n stop playing games wif ur heart.hope this helps

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  • 16MsMason4AllEternity16
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10 years 5 months ago #3 by 16MsMason4AllEternity16
16MsMason4AllEternity16 created the topic: Don't know what to do
Hi my name is Marissa and I got pregnant when I was 16 and now I am 17. Me and my baby father was just doing great at the beginning of our relationship. He always wanted to be around me and rub my tummy. Then slowly he started to be over his friend house when his mother was supposely drop him off at my house. I mean excuse me for what I'm about to write but every time he would come over he would have sex with me and then say he would have to go over his feind house and then he would come back when his mother was on her way to pick him up from my house. Now he stays over for no longer than 20 minutes and we don't even have sex during those 20 minutes and he doesn't come back at all. I tell him how I feel and all he say is that I am complaining and trying to argue. I know I'm not wrong. My baby even knows that this isn't right because he is moving very hard and vigorously as I'm typing this. I don't know what to do cause he says once I'm done complaining he is still going to be the same and not change. He does illegal things. I talk to hi and show him I care about what he does but he says he will stop when he decides on it. He doesn't ever want any advice from me. He puts me after all his friends and he doesn't want me to have friends or go anywhere without telling him. He won't even let me walk by myself. I tell him constantly that it is good for me and the baby but he refuses to listen. He says that me being pregnant is boring and no fun. He said he is tired of me being \"FAT\", he says he can't have sex with me the way he wants to because of my baby. I am so confused because I need my child to have a father figure and I know that this could have my son torn when he is older. What do I do should I stay or leave????

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