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adoption or be a mom

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10 years 7 months ago #1 by sibzy
sibzy replied the topic: Re:adoption or be a mom
THE LOVE OF A CHILD IS A LOVE YOU CAN NEVER REPLACE. ITS A LOVE THAT CAN MAKE EVERY STRUGLE IN LIFE WORTHWHILE.

THIS CHILD IS ALREADY A PART OF YOU AND LETTING IT GO MIGHT MAKE YOU LOSE A BIT OF YOURSELF.

EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON AND A UNEXPECTED PREGNANCY IS A MIRACLE OF LIFE AND A NEW LOVE WAITING TO BLOSSOM.

THERE ARE NEVER ANY REGRETS WITH CHILDREN BECAUSE EVERY GIGGLE OR SMILE MAKES IT ALL SEEM WORTH WHILE.

I LET MY CHILD GO AND MY HEART IS BROKEN, I WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO REPLACE HER LOVE. I WILL HAVE MORE CHILDREN BUT HER LOVE WILL ALWAYS BE MISSING.

TRUST YOUR HEART.

ONLY YOU CAN MAKE THIS DECISION...

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10 years 7 months ago #2 by meyerz12191
meyerz12191 replied the topic: Re:adoption or be a mom
When I first was pregnant i thought of adoption. But then i thought im only going to live this life once and Im going to have only one first child. I know the minute you look in your childs eyes you will feel a love for him or her and know thatd youd do anything for him or her. You have a job that you are licensed for and a supporting family. I belive and have faith that you and your baby would make it. It is your choice and Im sure if you follow your heart you will come to the right decision. ;)

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10 years 7 months ago #3 by Julie
Julie replied the topic: Re:adoption or be a mom
You are this baby's mother, and you have to make this choice based on what you belive is best for your child. Not on what feels best for you, or what your parents, church or friends expect. If you make your choice based on what is best for him/her, I believe you will make the right choice.

My husband and I adopted our son. His mother chose adoption because she wanted him to have a father and knew that she wasn't yet prepared to be the kind of mother she wanted him to have. We became friends and stay in touch. She is doing really well. But she made her choice herself, based on his best interests. I believe that, if she had been forced into adoption, or had done so to please someone else, the outcome wouldn't be so good.

I just want you to know that, if you choose an adoptive family for your child, they will love him every bit as much as you will. I have an adopted son and a 'homemade' daughter, and there is no difference in our love for them.

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10 years 8 months ago #4 by Mommyof2babies
Mommyof2babies replied the topic: Re:adoption or be a mom
Adoption is a very loving alternative..theres a possbility that i'm preg again and my youngest is only 3 mos old..we've decided if i am preg that we are going to let my cousin adopt the baby..it would be best for everyone and she wants another baby but she cant have anymore kids..she has a 12 yr old and a 6 yr old twin girls. i hope you listen to your heart..my son is 3 mos and my daughter will be 2 may 25th.

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10 years 8 months ago #5 by kgirlsmith
kgirlsmith replied the topic: Re:adoption or be a mom
It all comes down to two things:
1. What can you live with?
2. What is best for your baby?

It sounds like you will have support from your parents so that is a good thing! Our pastor's son's girlfriend got pregnant at ~16 and the pastor and his wife really stepped up as well as our whole church. We all helped with their little boy.
So....I guess it comes back to what can you live with:
financially, emotionally, what you'll be giving up, what you'll be getting. Nobody can answer that but you.

#2 - The most selfish thing that a mom can do is pick what is best for her baby even when she knows it'll hurt her. No matter what you choose, it'll hurt you in some way....loss of your youth/young adult years in a manner you'd dreamed, emotionally, financially, etc.....if you keep the baby and

mostly emotionally if you choose to show your love for your baby for selecting just the right family to love and raise the little one.

No real answer - it is the most difficult decision you'll make this year, maybe the most for year or for forever!

Since it sounds like you are a Christian, know that the Lord knew this baby before conception and He has a plan for this baby even if you didn't plan to become a mom now. Pray, be still, seek His plan for your life and for your baby's life - either choice you make.

If you choose adoption, put all your energy into finding the type of family you desire for your baby - the kind that the Lord would desire for the baby. Seek the type of adoption you'd like - closed or open. Get photos and letters and even visits occasionally if that will make it easier.

If you choose to parent, put your energy into doing the very best you can. Either choice is a choice of love.... It is just a very difficult choice.

Know that no matter what, God will still love you. He'll give you the strength you need - even if it doesn't always feel that way.

A friend of mine who is the mother of one 2 year old litle girl just had a 2nd baby in February. She decided that the best thing for the baby was adoption - why? She already has her hands full and has realized how difficult (even with family support) it is togive her daughter everything she wants her to have and she wanted to be able to cotinue to do the best she can with her 2 year old while also making the choice that her new baby would have everything she needs. She found a Christian family a few towns away. They have already sent photos and my friend will be able to keep in touch.

my 2 cents.

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10 years 8 months ago #6 by Meg11
Meg11 replied the topic: Re:adoption or be a mom
I respect the fact that your choice is to keep the baby or adopt. My question is now that you have found yourself in this spot if you adopt the baby are you going to learn from this? A girl in my town lost her virginity on a night of irrational thinking, got pregnant , and has put her daughter in a good home. the people who adopted her allow visits from her . She will always be known as a \"friend of the family\" untill her daughter is an adult and mature enough to handle the truth. Since this change in her life she no longer puts herself in an environment to make poor decisions. And she has learned from this. So my prayer for you is that you would either keep the baby and walk a tough but rewarding road of reprocussions or that you would place this baby in a home that cannot conceive a child. But regardless of your decission may you truly press into the Lord, learn a lesson, and see Gods grace all around you :) God Bless

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