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What should I do?

10 years 9 months ago #1 by DaveLuver
DaveLuver replied the topic: Re:What should I do?
I dont know if I could forgive my man after all that yours said to you. If you feel that he is really sorry though, give it another try. But dont let him think that he can push you around and then come running back when hs says hes sorry. Good luck with your baby. And that man of yours.

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10 years 9 months ago #2 by ericklirios
ericklirios replied the topic: Re:What should I do?
One of the things you should do is accept your boyfriend's limitations. This is but the start of it. It would really help to remember that when he doesn't know what to do, he can lash out in anger. I'm not telling you this to scare you. You should know how to handle it and know that sometimes, when he is angry, it doesn't mean he loves you less but he simply doesn't know what to do. It's his way of flailing in the water, so to speak.

Things will be more difficult, that's for sure especially when things about money matters come into play. Sooner or later, you will have to provide for yourselves and things can get a bit ticky when money is scarce. Hold on to each other and always remember that since you seem to have chosen this path, the path of true partnership is not keeping your fears, your anger inside of you. PArt of being together is sharing everything and you should know how and WHEN to share. No point in forcing the issue of how to care for your baby when he's shouting his head off. Let things cool down and discuss things after but make sure you discuss things. Don't resort to just blabbing to your girlfriends. Tell your friends about your difficulties but always remember that the partner in your relationship is the father of your child.

Lastly, you seem a bit concerned about your present inability to let go of your feelings for him when he lashed out seven months ago. It's part of your pregnancy and the hormonal changes you're presently undergoing. Though there is an issue between you, it may be exacerbated by the said hormonal changes. Pregnant women have a tendency to be more sensitive that usual. Since you're young and I suppose still concerned about your looks (fine, everybody else is really. Hehe), having such a big bulge makes you need constant affirmation. The constant pain doesn't help either. Whenever that gets you down, remember that the little kicking infant inside of you is already your friend. Talk to her. She can actually already hear.

Take care.


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10 years 9 months ago #3 by Niky
Niky replied the topic: Re:What should I do?
hey girl

I almost went through the same story, just my sons, 1year now, father only got into our lives when the baby was 9 months old. I had to take my child for DNA tests after he told his whole family he does'nt think it is his child. But I wish I could show you a picture they look like twin brothers and the other thing is we knew one another since std 3.(I am 22 now). We use to fight so much and I did not want him to come near us because of all the things he has done and put me through. I did not have any suport from him while I was pregnant, went alone into the hospital and I stayed with my parents. Now we are trying to get back together and it IS NOT VERY EASY for me at all. I do love him and I want to share everything and day with him but I still can't fogive him for those months he treated me like \"crap\".
But we spoke about it all and we are working on thing slowly and take everything as it comes. I know how you feel and I understand a 100%, but I don't think you can just let go and forget about it all. You have to work on it, and it has to come from both sides, if you love him and he loves you, give it time and work on it each day. Because to love someone can't just disapear and that's why I believe for you that it can workout for you to see over the past and enjoy the future with your new little one.

Good luck aan let me know how things work out...


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10 years 9 months ago #4 by LmWhasMyx3
LmWhasMyx3 replied the topic: Re:What should I do?
I just want to tell u that I truly understand you 100% on ur decision to still mad, that is his baby too and was from the second u got pregnant. No one is at fault for this. I am a STARN Christian that God BLESSES you with a baby you do not choose to have one or not have one. You have a right to be mad angry and hurt, it will take time but whenever u see his face when he sees his \"princess\" it will all disappear TRUST me I kno. Congrads on your lil one keep me posted on ur situation please


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10 years 9 months ago #5 by Ndanu
Ndanu replied the topic: Re:What should I do?
hey, I'm 19 too and 8months pregnant wit my 1st child. lets just say the road to where i am now has been so difficult and challenging for me. My baby's father isn't my boyfriend ,atleast not officially, and he was in a relationship while we were having sex... Though your boyfriend made a mistake in treating you the way he did, think about what's best for your baby coz that is all that matters. I wish my baby daddy would be as supportive as your boyfrind is to you but you know what duzn't kill us makes us stronger right? you have to move on before you drive him away with the hate you feel for him. you need to talk with him before you find yourself alone and scared girl... do it for your baby coz she/he deserves to have her/his father around. I hope my situation has given you insight on what to do and has helped you value what needs to be. take care and d the right thing.:)

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10 years 9 months ago #6 by alittle_mirical_inside_me
alittle_mirical_inside_me replied the topic: Re:What should I do?
DO you know why you are still angry? He has treated you in such a terrible way. ANd you cant forget what he has done to you, even though he is so sweet. The reason u cant forget is because you love him. any alteration of mood or charater in a man is chalenging to deal with. You though you knew him well, maybe you do. The thing is, does he know himself? He may be so scared the he thinks the only was to be tough and deal with the \"problem\" is to cast it away. the month you were gone he probably realized what he did and how close he was to losing you. Just remember he was scareed and didnt know what to do. Discuss it with him in a maner that doesnt deal with how it made you feel, yet how he felt.
love ya!
-anne true

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