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I'm really scared

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11 years 4 months ago #1 by Kit
Thank you for your encouraging story. When the doctor mentioned the possibility of aborting this baby it was really painful. We were scared, but we love out son no matter what. We've had lots of family and friends praying for this little guy and it seems that we've had a miracle. The last ultrasound the doctor said that it looks like the problem has corrected itself and that it does not look like there will be brain damage or need for shunt surgery after he is born. The doctor is expecting that all will be close to normal. We would not have chosen to abort even if the prognosis continued to be bad, but it concerns me that the doctor brought up the option and it looks like our child will be healthy. I wonder how many children who would have been healthy are aborted out of fear of suspected problems.

I don't smoke. I smoked a little bit, never heavily (maybe a cigarette a day at my heaviest) over five years ago. I haven't smoked since. My husband on the other hand still smokes. I have been encouraging him to quit. I think he was getting pretty close to kicking the habit until we had the problems with the pregnancy which didn't help his attempt to quit. He doesn't smoke in the house, and I try not to breathe the smoke if I am outside near him while he is smoking. Still I'd like for my husband to be around as a husband and father. I'd prefer for our children to have two non smoking parents for thier health and also as better role models. Hopefully he will be able to quit - but ultimately he has to do it I can't break the havit for him. Best wishes.

Kate

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11 years 4 months ago #2 by Landyns*Auntie
I'm really sorry to hear about the devastating news youve received...but, this might make you feel better. My mother had my older brother when she was 39 years old. The doctors tried over and over to convince her to abort him..they said he was going to be mentally retarded. she had six miscarriages and one ectopic pregnancy before she finally had a successful pregnancy.she was soooo excited. then the doctors told her that. she was strong though and never gave in. she had been trying to have children for years. she was NOT going to abort her child no matter what. well, she had him and a few years when by..and she got pregnant with me at 41. they told her i also would be retarded. but once again she wouldnt let anything get her down at her time of happiness......turns out we were the opposite of what the drs predicted. we both we very smart and athletic..neither one of us in school ever had lower than a 4.0---needless to say, the doctors arent always right...sometimes what shouldve or couldve been wrong,isnt....My point is, dont give up hope..you never know.it could and i think, WILL turn out to be perfectly healthy...but you realllllly do need to try to stop smoking....you dont want to know you caused your baby to have weak lungs.....i hope all goes well and this makes you feel better..

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  • let_me_lead_you
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11 years 5 months ago #3 by let_me_lead_you
Kit,
I hope the best. And I hope that everything turns out right. Please when you find out let me know the news.

Try to think the postive. Not the negitive. Keep hoping and praying. It will find itself to the true path. I hope the best and will keep you in my hopes.

Love Always,
Megan

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11 years 5 months ago #4 by maime
hi hun, i cant imagine what your going through but i know a girl whose mom had the same problem when she was pregnant with her. i work in a dog groomers and as most dogs get groomed every 6-8 wks we get to know the owners pretty well. this woman was told all sorts of horrible things about how her daughter would suffer-physically and mentally and she had her and kept her and wouldnt put her in an institution where they could \"help her better\". she started her daughter in physically therapy and mental stimulation therapy at 6 months and today her daughter is 14 and doing so good, her only problem is a slight limp and sometimes she needs to slow down cuz she thinks faster than she talks-but then so do a lot of people. just love him and itll all turn out ok. my bf said things are rough now but theyll get better and itll be well worth it.

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  • HappyGrandma
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11 years 5 months ago #5 by HappyGrandma
Kate,
I have two daughters Ashley which is 18 and Chelsie which is 26 and a son that is 23. Chelsie is the one that is expecting. Actually I have not had a lot of time to research the child support issue. I work a lot :( From what I understand we can't do a whole lot until the baby gets here.
We just found out Chelsie will be having a girl. The baby is not even here yet and she already has three pairs of shoes (Just like a woman). :)
Keep us posted.
Denise

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11 years 5 months ago #6 by Kit
Denise,

Thank you so much for your words of encouragement and prayers. That means a great deal to me! Is Ashley your daughter that is expecting? Have you figured out more about child support? I have also been praying for you and for your daughter. We're waiting to find out more information. There isn't much I can do at this point except for praying a whole lot. I've been trying to keep a positive outlook and not get too stressed and depressed (which isn't easy) because that can't be good for the baby or for me. I've been trying to focus on work and school and to seek out information on how to care for my son if he does have special needs. Thanks again for your support and prayers!

Kate

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