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decisions full of heartache

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9 years 11 months ago #1 by lifeandmusic8975
lifeandmusic8975 replied the topic: Re:decisions full of heartache
Let me start by saying this. I already know that you are a strong woman if you have already been through this before. You have every right to keep your child. Do not let your boyfriend make you feel like you only have abortion as an option. That is not right, he should be the one supporting whatever action you choose to take, not make you feel like you will be a bad mother if you keep your baby. Also there is always adoption! There are so many families that can't have little babies! Don't you think they also deserve the chance to have a little blessing like a baby in their lives? No one should ever make you feel like abortion is your only option. Now, if you choose abortion as YOUR choice and your not choosing it because of someone else then that was YOUR option and yours alone. You are the mother carrying the child, not your boyfriend or your parents! But If I were in this situation and really felt that I could not support my baby I would choose adoption purely for the fact that I know that a lot of people will never have the chance to have a child, and I could never waste that precious life. All I want you to know is you have people here that will support you through whatever decision you choose is right for you. You are your own person, mother, and woman. And you CAN make your own choices, so don't let anyone else make you feel that you can't!! If you ever need someone to talk to please feel free to send me a message.

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9 years 11 months ago #2 by momtocolton
momtocolton replied the topic: Re:decisions full of heartache
I think that there are other options out there like adoption.. Why not give your baby life instead of thinking about death.. It would make some families dreams come true to be a family. The love that you have for your son will help you get through this.. I just know if you choose to have an abortion that you will probably never forgive yourself.. I know you are struggling and don't know what to do.. It is okay to be scared and stuff just let your heart lead you it will never lead you astray... I wish you the best and hope that you will be okay.. If you want to ever talk send me a message... Thanks

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10 years 2 days ago #3 by ericklirios
ericklirios replied the topic: Re:decisions full of heartache
Hi.

I'm sorry you had to go through this. Sex outside marriage is problematic at best and well, here we are.

My suggestion to you here is not any different from what I've said on this site so many times: Stand your ground and keep the baby. You will regret every day of your life (if you're an honest person) if you turn your back on such a blessing. Do I know what I'm talking about? Yes, I do.

When I got my wife pregnant, I decided that we would keep the baby but we wouldn't get together. When I got her pregnant again, I decided differently and led the way towards an abortion. Later on, we eventually got married and are still married up to now. We now have three kids together and two in heaven. (We lost a five-month old son after we got married.)

Both of us really wish that we could all be together that instead of having five people in the family, the whole seven could be here. Whenever we see a little girl (she would've been 11 by now), we know that we could've had a girl just like that, one who would take care of her siblings along with her eldest brother.

But we don't. All we really have is the fact that we could've but did not.

Don't do that to yourself. Keep the baby.

Your boyfriend's not ready? Who is? Stick to your guns and show him that this is the right thing to do. If he stays, he's worth your time. If he leaves, he's just as worthless as the other guy whose only good point was the fact that he can sire a baby.

I said this in response to a post before: show that man what's right. Many guys go through life looking for a woman who will fight for what's right and when we find that woman (I sure have), we will stick to her because finally, we have someone with whom we can face the world.

Please keep the baby. There will be no regret regardless of the hardships. What am I saying? You already know that. Make sure you don't lose track of what you already know.

Keep the baby, stand up to your boyfriend and show him that he's facing a REAL woman who is already loving his own child even if he isn't yet. You are that and nothing less.

God bless you, honey.

Erick

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10 years 2 days ago #4 by alexanders_mama
alexanders_mama replied the topic: Re:decisions full of heartache
You've done it once, and you can do it again.
Just think for a second, pregnancy doesn't happen without a reason. If it happened, it was meant to be.
And think about this: your son will have a sibling! You are a strong woman, and you can do this.
I'm here if you need to chat, I had my son at 17 and he's two and a half, and I've being doing it alone the whole time as well...

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10 years 4 days ago #5 by breathless
breathless replied the topic: Re:decisions full of heartache
You're definitley in a scary situation and I hate to say this but the right decision is the hardest one, you have to give the baby life! Whether or not you choose to keep baby (adoption??) is up to you but abortion is not the way to go, just look at your son and think about what if you aborted him?? I'm looking at my beautiful two week old son and it makes me cry thinking that at one point I was thinking of abortion, those beautiful eyes, soft skin and thick hair would all be gone and I would be left with nothing. Abortion is so wrong girl, everyone deserves a chance!! In a lot of ways adoption is a great solution, both you, baby and baby's family win in this decision! Abortion hurts everyone! I'm only fifteen and I was so scared to find out I was pregnant, but unlike you I had (and have) lots of support from my family and boyfriend so I'm not going to say I know exactly what you are going through. All I know is abortion is not the way! I think for the best of you and your son bringing another baby into your life may be too much right now but I am sure the family that can not have children and are financially and emotionally stable would love to bring your child into their arms to call him or her their own. Please do the right thing and give baby a chance, everyone will thank you for it! Look into adoption before you make any more decisions and know that all the girls (and some guys) here at Standupgirl are here for you to offer support whenever you need, don't be afraid to reach out we are all here to help!!

Talk to me anytime and I hope this hard patch in your life gets better, Good luck!
Anna

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10 years 4 days ago #6 by kez_mummy_2_skye
kez_mummy_2_skye replied the topic: Re:decisions full of heartache
You have brought up one child so you CAN do this again. You said its hard but very rewarding. Would you want to be in a position to tell your son when he is older that he could have had a little sibling, not to mention what sort of emotional impact its going to have on ur life if you do abort. I've heard from girls saying that they are pregnant and financially they cant do it BUT they do and its not as hard as it seems honestly.
I hope you figure out what u want and dont make a mistake on ur behalf

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