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I just found out I'm 2 months pregnant..

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5 years 6 months ago #1 by Cassie5492
Cassie5492 replied the topic: Re: I just found out I'm 2 months pregnant..
Thanks a lot! Your response means a lot to me..but my mom's not afraid he'll leave me..she wants him to leave me..she just doesn't want to live all alone..I wish she thought of what I want but she doesn't..she tells me I don't love him and he's probably cheating on me or selling drugs, and calls him an asshole..and all these things for no reason..she was starting to get along with him sort of before this, but now, my bf just wants to avoid her at all costs..and it hurts to be torn between them. But I know how my mother is, so I can't blame him..I just really wish she would give him a chance. She assumes he's like my father just because he had a rough past..And I hate it..it's not fair..and I don't know what to do..yesterday was my birthday and my bf asked me to marry him..I said yes..but I can't tell my mom..that would be worse to her than me being pregnant..she already told me that..but if I hide it from her she'll only be angrier later on..there's just no way for me to win anymore :/

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5 years 6 months ago #2 by renee
renee replied the topic: Re: I just found out I'm 2 months pregnant..
Sounds like a tough spot to be in :( I think your mother is motivated out of love for you still. Do keep talking with her about everything. She's done a lot for you and sometimes when I don't think so, those people are still the people with great advice. Of course she loves her little girl and of course she wants the best for her grandchild. Maybe if she got to know the bf better first it would help? She might just want to make sure he's committed to the relationship and won't every leave you and her grandchild. That is a loving and very caring place she is coming from then. It is a lot safer to know that the father of your child won't leave you....that's why a binding marriage relationship where you both promise to love (which means an action of loving, not necessarily always a feeling) is the safest and most rewarding. So, I guess dialoguing with your mom some more might help you see where she is coming from possibly....and it is always nicest if you can maintain a healthy relationship with her. Let her know you love her and care about her thoughts....and also consider what is in the long run healthiest for your little on. Congrats and my prayers as you make these sorts of decisions!

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5 years 6 months ago #3 by Cassie5492
Cassie5492 replied the topic: Re: I just found out I'm 2 months pregnant..
I replied to this but I don't know if it went through..yeah that's true..I feel bad since my boyfriend works all day and both my mom and him get out at the same time and I go to spend time with him. I know she feels left out but I mean I don't really get to see him..and I plan on moving out soon..but she would rather him leave me or get deported than see me move out..it's always about her..that she doesn't want to be alone..that she wants my life this way not that way..but I'm a mom now..and it's time that I be a good mother instead of always trying to protect my own.

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5 years 6 months ago #4 by Cassie5492
Cassie5492 replied the topic: Re: I just found out I'm 2 months pregnant..
Yeah but I just don't think she'll ever get over it. She divorced my father, and then my cousin who was living with us moved out..and now she's like oh you're pregnant so you're leaving me too? But in my eyes, I'm doing what's best for my daughter/son. He/she deserves an opportunity to have a complete family, mother and father..and considering I had a terrible childhood, I will not take that away from him/her. I want to give him/her everything I never had, which was a real family. But my mom just sees it as, it will never work, I'll be miserable, I don't really love him, and all this stuff she wants to believe. She rather him leave me so she could keep me all to herself. She's not thinking about what's truly best for her daughter and grandchild. It really sucks. I don't want to hurt her but she's giving me no choice..

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5 years 6 months ago #5 by Punky
Punky replied the topic: Re: I just found out I'm 2 months pregnant..
Cassie-
I think all mom's are just like that. My mom always gave me a hard time when I would do stuff with my boyfriend. She acted like I was choosing him over her. I wasn't and it was sometimes hard, but they start to get used to the fact that you have a life that isn't just focused on them. Br brave, you can do it!

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5 years 6 months ago #6 by Cassie5492
Cassie5492 replied the topic: Re: I just found out I'm 2 months pregnant..
Thank you! Yeah well right now I plan on moving in with my boyfriend, but my mother is not content with that at all. She actually would rather him leave me so I could live at home :/

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